Archives for posts with tag: baby

I know that a lot of people stumble across my blog, thanks to google. Many of them are looking for hope and encouragement in their fertility journey. Since infertility will always be a subject close to my heart, I want to get this information out there in case it might be of help to someone. 

When we were trying to improve DH’s sperm count, motility, and morphology, I researched natural ways to help. It seems there is an overwhelming amount of information on the internet for natural supplements, but it’s all scattered around here and there and takes forever to sort through. As I sifted through everything, I compiled this list. 

Keep in mind, I have no medical degree and I certainly am not advising anyone to take this huge pile of supplements. In fact, I can’t even tell you that it will up your count or quality at all. All I know is, whether or not it contributed to the miracle conceptions that God blessed us with, it certainly didn’t hurt. Most of these supplements are good for your general health, regardless and are things DH needs to be on to keep other health issues at bay. So, here goes.

Vitamin C – 1,500mg

Vitamin E – 800iu (I prefer to use the natural version of vitamin E, vs the synthetic)

Zinc – 60mg

B12 – 100mcg (We actually take a b-complex that is methylated for better absorption. I’ll gladly tell you what it’s called if you want to know.)

Selenium – 200mcg

CoQ10 – 100mg

L-Carnitine – not sure of amount

Vitamin A – this was in a multi he was taking at the time, so I’m not sure on the dose of this either

Flax oil and/or Fish oil – 1,200mg 

L-Arginine – 500mg

Vitamin D – 5,000iu

Astaxanthin – 12mg

Obviously, you should check this list over with your dr before taking these things. Particularly if you are on medication as the supplements and meds could interact. I just wanted to put this list our there in case it could help someone else. 

*For reference, DH’s last semen analysis (he’s had many) was 1million, sub par motility and 0% morphology. We have gone on to have 3 successful pregnancies through ivf and spontaneous conception since that test. 🙂 

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I’m going to post this without pictures for now because I haven’t uploaded them yet and don’t have time right now, but I’ll try to post them soon.

 

*This is the TMI version of the birth. Blood, amniotic fluid and all. If that disturbs you, I’d recommend skipping this post.*

 

*Birth is usually a beautiful event. It is also a painful and sometimes dramatic event. This birth was mostly calm, but I don’t sugar-coat the pain. Just know that it was all 100% worth it and I wouldn’t change a thing because this is the way that my baby came into my arms and I am so thankful and blessed to have him here.*

 

I have a few spare minutes so I thought I’d try to get the birth story written down. It’s already getting very fuzzy on timelines and details but that’s ok. It was an absolutely beautiful birth. Horribly intense but very short labor. 38 weeks 5 days, the day before I was going to be induced, I spent the day at home with the boys just spending time together, cleaning up the house and getting the last items thrown in the hospital bags. We skipped nap time in favor of an early bedtime. The boys were in bed by 8pm and DH and I went to bed a little before 9. Of course, despite taking Unisom and a natural sleep supplement my sister L gave me, I didn’t fall asleep until after 11 and sleep was very fitful after that. I had to be up at 2:40am to get ready to leave for the hospital, but I woke up a little after 2 with pain in my leg and nervousness running crazy, so I got up around 2:20 and got a shower, curled my hair and had breakfast. We left the house a bit after 3:30 and got to the hospital at about 5am.

 

 

Once we got admitted to our room, the nurse hooked me and baby up to the monitor, asked 20 million questions and tried to start an IV. She couldn’t get it after 2 tries, so she had another nurse come in and get it started. That whole IV process took over half an hour! At that point, she flushed an entire bag of fluid through me and started the pitocin at 2 at about 7am or a little after. She checked me to get a starting point and I was 3cm, 60% effaced and baby was -2 station.

 

 

The contractions started soon after but were very mild, very short and not too frequent. (registering around 50 on the toco monitor)The next set of nurses came on shift right after that. One was in training and had only been there a few days and the other was so young, she couldn’t have been there long herself. They came in every half hour to increase the Pitocin by 2 and check my blood pressure. At 8:59am, I texted my mom to tell her that the contractions were getting stronger. At 9:04, I told her they were close. The Dr come in right after that to talk about breaking my water. I told her I didn’t want to yet and she asked when I would want her to. I told her, maybe in 4 hours. She said that was ok, but a long time and maybe 2 hours would be better and she would come back to check later. I asked her how high we were going to go on the Pitocin since I was VBAC and she said that they don’t usually induce VBACs so she couldn’t answer that. Then she left. At that point I had cycled through laboring in the bed, in the rocking chair and was now on the birth ball.

 

 

By the time they had bumped me to 6 on the pitocin, I told the nurse that I wouldn’t be able to stand much more. My contractions were over 124+ on the toco and happening very frequently. (From my labor with Levi, I knew that the pitocin on 3 was already too much for my body and they had to turn it off. Pathetic I know, but my uterus responds very very strong to just a tiny tiny bit.) I texted my mom at 9:25 that the contractions were much worse and very close, then at 9:33 I told her she should leave the house to come to the hospital soon! (They have a 1.5+ hour drive too) The nurse bumped the Pitocin to an 8 and I knew I couldn’t go any higher. The pressure and pain were horrendous by that point and I asked them to turn it down. I was trying to labor kneeling over the bed, and later standing while leaning on the bed. They kept saying that we wanted this kind of contractions and it was good, but from having been in labor before, I knew this was wayyy too intense for my body. Labor with Levi was very manageable. I could walk around and stop to squat with the contractions. I could breathe through them (until transition) but with these, I couldn’t bear it. I was breaking down crying and moaning very loudly and no matter how hard I tried to relax into the contraction and breathe through it, I couldn’t. They were coming very fast and the pain was completely localized on my c-section scar and intense downward pressure. Finally the nurses asked the Dr what to do and came back to the room to flush another bag of IV fluid through me and turn the Pitocin down to 4. Which helped space the contractions just a bit, and dimmed the pain enough that I stopped hyperventilating. My face and then my legs had gone numb from not being able to slow my breathing down, and my vision was getting weird, which was exactly what happened in my labor with Levi during transition. I kept saying “I’d think I was in transistion if it wasn’t so soon.” And the nurses and DH kept telling me that I probably was and that I should let the Dr come check me. I decided to try getting in the shower first because I couldn’t handle hearing that I hadn’t made any progress yet.

 

 

I got in the shower to sit on the seat for about 5 minutes, if that. It felt amazing and calmed me down, but the Dr came in the room again and asked if I wanted her to check me now or in 2 hours. I decided to do it now, even though I hated to get out of the shower, because I couldn’t imagine 2 more hours of this kind of labor. I had asked her at my first check, when I should get the epidural line placed and she said I didn’t have to. But at this point, hearing me while I was working through the pain and having 3 more contractions just getting out of the shower, she said I should go ahead and get it placed. I’m not sure if she became concerned because of the pain I was having or what, but all the pain was still localized to the scar area and downward pressure. She had talked earlier about putting a pressure monitor in my uterus to make sure I wasn’t rupturing, (never knew any such thing existed!) but said my water would have to be broken first. I didn’t have any scar pain with Levi, so that was new! Anyway, the Dr checked me and said I was 8cm, then she left the room with no other comment. I thought that was weird since I knew she wanted to break my water soon, but she was very respectful of what I wanted and I appreciated that she wasn’t pushy at all. It was just so completely different from my experience with the Dr who delivered Levi. Night and day.

 

 

So, the anesthesiologist showed up right away (DH took a call from my mom right about then at 10:47am) and I was thrilled to see him! All through my pregnancy, I had been on the fence about getting the epidural dosed this time but I had decided I would go with whatever felt right at the time. I asked him what my options were for pain if I still wanted to get out of bed. (I had been to the bathroom about 800 times at that point and didn’t want to be stuck in bed or have a catheter.) He suggested a dose of fentanyl through the epidural line and said that would probably hold me over till the birth since the birth would be soon. I thought that was a great option! What I didn’t know was that it would make me itch all over and feel very warm, but it was worth it! He also gave me a shot of pepcid which was supposed to help the itching. I felt so much relief from the fentanyl! I was able to lay down in bed and rest my body. I had been shaking really badly through the pain and I finally calmed down and could breathe. At that point, my MIL, FIL, SIL and niece arrived. I was calm and able to talk to DH and my SIL between contractions for a little bit while everyone else waited in the waiting room. Then the contractions started hurting like crazy again and I was back in the dire pain situation again. I’m not sure how much time had passed. Maybe an hour? I could feel a warm sensation with each contraction. It felt like the water was flowing out of my body, but it hadn’t broken yet. I think that was the water bag bulging….

 

 

My parents arrived and I continued to work through the pain and contractions. My Dad stood by the bed looking quite helpless. I halfway felt bad for him and halfway found it quite humorous. He eventually left to go sit with my FIL. When I went to use the bathroom, there was quite a lot of blood and I got scared but the nurse said it was normal. After a little while, I was clinging to the bed rail, half sitting during the contractions, crying and starting to freak out again. The nurse checked me and said I was 10cm and my water bag was bulging. She said if we could break the water, baby would come fast. I was so scared to get my water broke, mostly because I didn’t know how I could cope with any more pain, but I agreed to let the Dr come break my water. My mom, DH and the nurses were all telling me to just let the Dr do it so we could get the pain and delivery over with. Right after the nurse left the room, I felt two pops around my belly button. A couple of seconds passed and then water started gushing out. It wasn’t nearly as much water as I’d had with Levi, but it was much less painful to have it break on its own rather than having a Dr digging in there with the hook. I was so relieved that the Dr didn’t have to break it. At this point, the contractions were so incredibly intense with pressure, but I still didn’t have the urge to push. DH went to get the nurse and she came back in the room a few minutes later. I don’t think she was at all convinced my water had gone but she called for the Dr. I told the nurse I wanted the pitocin off because I was contracting so fast and hard. She wouldn’t turn it off and I was like “I am obviously having the baby now. My labor isn’t going to stop.” But anyway, when she left the room, I turned the drip off. I know I shouldn’t have, but it seemed so stupid to have it still running and causing me so much extra intense pain.

 

 

At that point, a few minutes before 1pm, I told the nurse that I wanted another dose of fentanyl. The anesthesiologist said that wasn’t allowed so I asked for a small dose of the epidural. Everyone was all “You don’t need it! You’ll be having the baby in a few minutes!” But I insisted that I did want it. I had pretty much made up my mind that I wanted something to take the edge off during pushing and in case I ended up with a million stitches again. So, the anesthesiologist came in again and I explained that I wanted only the very smallest amount of medicine possible. I wanted to be able to move my legs and change positions and push in whatever position felt right. Not to be numb entirely or unable to move my legs. He said he had just the thing and gave me a shot through the line. He said to lay on my back for 7-10 minutes to let the medicine work. I couldn’t though. I had to sit up. I couldn’t handle even one contraction laying down.

 

 

The Dr arrived right after that and checked me. She told me to start pushing. I had been sobbing and saying “I don’t want to push!” over and over. I feel kind of silly looking back now. 😉 But I realized later that the reason I didn’t want to push was because I was so worried I would hemorrhage again. That and I was afraid I would tear. Anyway, I still didn’t have the urge to push, just the incredible intense pressure I had felt all day. That and the horrible pain in my incision which was overriding every other sensation in my body. But the Dr just started counting, so I pushed. 3 pushes and his head was right there. I think I pushed through 4 contractions, 2 or 3 pushes each time. Once his head was halfway out, she said to stop and let my body stretch so I wouldn’t tear (with Levi I wasn’t told to stop and that probably caused a lot of the tearing). She said he would come out on his own with the next contraction. I impulsively reached down and felt Zane’s head. It was so warm and soft. I couldn’t wait to get him out! Once I had another contraction, out he popped at 1:09pm, with his right hand up by his face just like it always was in my ultrasounds. I think I pushed about 6 minutes. The nurse had covered my belly with a towel and I kept pushing it away and she kept moving it back. I was getting so annoyed! I wanted the baby right on me. His cord was very short so he couldn’t go on my chest until DH cut it about a minute after birth. (I wanted to wait longer but the Dr said they will only wait 1 minute – oh well) FINALLY, they moved Zane up onto my chest and it was such an incredible feeling. He cried, I cried…. 🙂

 

 

The placenta was out a minute or 2 later with no issues. The Dr said I had a tiny tear (Yep! I felt that happening!) and needed 2 stitches. Thankfully, the epidural had worked its way to where I needed it and the stitching wasn’t painful. During the pushing, I had sensation but not so much burning as I had with Levi. I’m not sure if that was due to the epidural starting to take effect or if it was just an easier birth. Either way, I was very happy with how everything went. I wouldn’t change a thing!! I lost very little blood and was up and walking to the bathroom less than 2 hours later. I felt amazing! Not like I had just had a baby. I have had seriously almost no soreness down there at all. I can’t believe the difference in healing this time. I am so thankful for how God worked everything out!! I know DH was praying all through the labor and so was I. I had my mom, MIL, SIL, and sisters S and M and of course, DH there during the birth and it was perfect. I had been on the fence about having so many people in the room again, but I don’t regret it at all. I know they were all praying for us and it just felt cozy and happy. I am also so happy that I got the Dr that I had that day. When I had a prenatal check up with her, I had told DH that I would be happy with her at the birth and she really was great. 🙂 And honestly, even though we had young and very fresh nurses, they did a great job and I am happy that they got to see us all the way through the labor and birth.

 

So, all told, I had 6 hours of labor, but only 3.5 hours of hard labor. If I had went into labor at home and waited to see if it was the real thing and called my sister to come watch the kids and had DH come home from work and then drove over 1.5 hours to the hospital – we likely would have either barely made it in time, or had the baby in the car. Of course, it’s possible that labor would have been slower without pitocin, but who knows how much more I might have dilated before labor started. I think it was a good call to induce and I don’t regret it even though I thought I might. And I am happy Zane was born without any distress aside from a few minor dips in heartrate during the labor. Just so thankful he was born safe and happy. 🙂

 

 

We stayed in the hospital for 2 days. We were going to go home the next day but Zane’s bilirubin came back at 5.1, so we opted to stay at the pediatrician’s request because of how bad Levi’s jaundice had gotten. They wanted to watch him another night just in case. The next day it was 7.8 but my milk was coming in at that point and he was out of the danger zone. 🙂 It was nice to have another day in the hospital, mostly because Zane had come so fast that he choked on the mucus all night that hadn’t been squeezed through his lungs. I felt better having the nurses nearby because I ended up buzzing them once when I couldn’t get the mucus suctioned out and I started to get scared. Obviously, he was fine. Also, he was so sore after the circumcision that I was glad he had a day to heal before coming home and being passed around and held by his big brothers. We missed Tru and Levi so much and they missed us too and ended up crying on the second night but we talked to them on the phone and they were alright. 🙂 Little Zane is 1 week old today!! He is such a calm and happy baby. He has woken up about 2 times a night, every night since he was born. Hoping that he keeps doing so well. I am so thankful for my Third Gracious Gift of God. 🙂

How far along? 31 weeks 5 days (9-22-17) Yes, I missed my 30 week update. Last week was crazy! I’ll try to do a little recap below.

 
Symptoms? Queasy, breathless, some swelling that comes and goes. Restless legs and the occasional grab of round ligament pain. Pain in the front of my pelvis…. I know there are a few other things but I’m drawing a blank right now….. I guess I still feel pretty good. 🙂

 
Weight? I forgot to weigh myself today. I think about +33-34ish. It’s hard to tell with the swelling. I was +31 and then dropped to +29, then up to +34 overnight and have been bouncing up and down. All I know is, I am definitely feeling the extra pounds!

 
Sleep? Not so good. For some reason, Zane will oftentimes push his feet out really hard if I try to lay on my right side. (I looked back on my updates with Levi and he didn’t like me laying on my left side.) It’s almost like he isn’t comfortable that way. So I have been sleeping mostly on my left but waking up on my back a lot.

 
Exercise? I got in 2 days last week but only 1 this week. It’s getting harder to motivate myself to exercise instead of taking advantage of the boys’ naptime to catch up on some rest myself!

 
Cravings/aversions? I am definitely feeling more aversions to foods. I am not able to eat as much at a time (FINALLY!!!!!) and lots of stuff just doesn’t sound as good. I am totally ok with that as I feel it is a good thing at this stage of pregnancy (and weight gain). 😉

 
Bump? Oh boy! I feel like it stayed modestly sized for quite awhile after the initial bump poppage happened. But now it is definitely feeling larger and heavier and much lower! Next week is the start of our weekly (for now) NSTs. The Dr asked me at my appointment last week if I wanted to do them once a week or twice. I told her, let’s start with once and if my anxiety gets the best of me or if anything comes up, we’ll go to twice a week. She was happy with that plan. 🙂 I also asked her if she is comfortable with me going to my due date and she said no, she wants to induce by 39 weeks. I was/am hoping to avoid induction (and definitely hoping we can safely birth baby without a C-section) and I know my Dr would much prefer I go into labor on my own as well. So here’s hoping that labor starts on it’s own before the induction date if baby is ready and happy to come out.

 

 

Ok, so last week was so busy and I’m already forgetting the majority of how it went…. Sunday: Went to church, stopped at the store so I could buy some glue on nails (to match the dress I bought for maternity pictures), picked up a pizza for lunch and drove to the park for our family/maternity pictures. After that was done, we went to my parent’s house (my mom had been overseas on a trip for almost 3 weeks at that point) and I helped Dad get stuff cleaned up. He had been working on the brakes on our truck since they had went out on me a few weeks prior, so we took our truck home.
Monday: I sat around the house all day worrying about the baby because he hadn’t moved much. I debated whether I should go get checked out and finally by 7pm or so, I decided to go to triage for peace of mind. DH stayed home with the boys, which was good because I didn’t get home till midnight. Baby was fine, obviously, but they did comment on his heart arrhythmia which was very pronounced that day. The Dr said to follow up with them about it. They also checked his fluid which was good at 12.1cm.
Tuesday: Up bright and early for my check up and growth ultrasound. My brother went with me to watch the kids because I didn’t have anyone who could babysit. The ultrasound measured baby’s fluid around 13cm. Zane weighed approx 3lbs 14oz. I was shocked that he is that big already but the tech said that was *only* the 61st percentile and wasn’t too big. They watched his heart for a long time because of the arrhythmia. Unfortunately, the Dr didn’t have the ultrasound report before I had my visit with her, so I don’t know if everything looked good or not. I’m hoping that it is all well. I mentioned that the soles of my feet have been itchy so she sent me for labs and they came back good. 🙂
Wednesday: I took the kids to story time in the morning and we hung out at home the rest of the day. In the evening, I was just getting ready to start supper when DH called on his way home. That’s rather unusual so I knew immediately something must be wrong. He did, in fact, go off the road into a ditch. The roads were wet because it had been raining all day. He did a 360 through a soybean field and took out a road sign. Thank the Lord, he was not hurt at all! He missed a power line pole by just a few feet. That could have been significantly worse! His back was a little sore but that was it. His car looks worse for wear with the passenger door smashed and the mirror missing, but aside from ripping the brake lines out, it is fine. He managed to get it out of the ditch and into a very sweet family’s driveway. The man helped him fix the brakes so he could drive home. We were so thankful for his help and for God keeping DH safe. 🙂
Thursday and Friday: Are totally coming up blank in my memory… Oh dear…. OH! I remember now… I cleaned for 6 hours straight on Friday. I went into full-on nesting mode and everything that seemed *gross* had to be cleaned. (Note: Everything seemed gross.) DH got sucked into my cleaning frenzy and we didn’t eat supper until super late. But the house was clean(er) and I was happy(er)…..Until the next day when I woke up so sore I could hardly function and had to take Tylenol just to move. Which wasn’t good because…
Saturday: The big walk/fundraiser for our local pregnancy center. They provide so much incredible help and resources to the moms, dads and babies/young children in our area. I didn’t know how I would make it for the whole walk, but I did! DH played music at the event also. Afterwards we went home and relieved my MIL from babysitting and I laid down for a short but extremely needed nap. Then we went to DH’s cousin’s wedding. I was wiped out at the end of that day!

 

 

Shew! That was longer than I realized. This week was less crazy but still a little busy. My sister came and stayed a couple days with us and babysat Levi while I took Tru to his follow up with the Pediatrician. He gained a half pound and hasn’t had an unexplained fever or belly pain in awhile, so we are supposed to go back in December to check in. 🙂 The church had prayed over Tru a fever weeks ago and he has been doing great. We very much want to continue on with him feeling better!! The Dr just said to keep him on stool softener for now. He is back on moderate amounts of dairy and not taking Prevacid. 🙂
We did a little shopping after the appointment since it was just me and Tru. I plan to have a one-on-one day with each of the boys in the next week or so. They desperately need to have my full attention for a day! I can’t believe how mature Tru is lately. Like today, we were going to a little street fair type of thing and he asked me if there would be rides there and if so, would that make his hat blow off. I was surprised that he thought ahead like that! He moved to a big boy bed last night and was so excited about it! He was asking to go to bed a full hour+ before bedtime. Awhile later he decided he didn’t like it and was scared, so I went and snuggled him for a bit. He still couldn’t sleep so I promised him we would go buy a nightlight for his room today. I arranged all his 500(ish) stuffed animals around his feet like he likes to have them and he finally fell asleep. He woke up this morning and announced he likes his new bed and wants to sleep in it tonight! Levi asked him “Why?” (of course!) and Tru said “All my animals are waiting for me.” SO CUTE!!! We went and bought him and Levi both a nightlight for their rooms and they were even excited to take naps. Score!! 🙂 The plan was to get Levi moved to the crib-converted-to-toddler-bed tonight, but I didn’t get it done yet. Maybe tomorrow.

 

Ok, this is getting too long.

 

Dear God, thank You for your protection and provision for us these last two weeks. Thank You for keeping DH safe. Please continue to watch over and protect each and every one of us. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

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Last weekend we were at a Christmas party and the boys were given little containers of skittles and m&ms. Levi dropped a couple, as toddlers do and I picked them up and put them back in his container. *GASP* Honestly, I didn’t really think anything of it. 5 second rule, blah blahs blah…. But I did get the sense that I had just done something horribly wrong given the vibe in the air from the nearby friends. A few minutes later, Levi dropped a few more candies and the ladies who were nearby quickly scooped them up saying to Levi “These fell on the floor. They’re dirty! I’ll throw them away.” 

Ok, let’s get one thing straight here. I’m completely elated to know that these friends care so much about the health and well-being of my kiddos that they are watching out for them. That actually just makes me really really happy. I’m quite touched! 

However, (!!!) I felt like a crumb – like a crumb of a turd, (the type that could be found on the floor perhaps?) for being such a gross parent as to just nonchalantly feed my child floor-candy without even giving thought to it. 

Seriously, these boys have eaten way grosser things before I could stop them, unfortunately. As babies/toddlers do. At least mine do. Maybe your unicorn baby never tried to taste sand … or lady bugs. Not that I’m going out of my way to expose them to germs but don’t you have to be exposed to some germs to build your immune system? “God made dirt, dirt don’t hurt.” Anyone? 

To be clear here, I’m not at home just throwing down their dinner on the floor “Come an git it boys! Sups on the floor. Jump in there River! Go fer it.” But I kinda might as well… I mean, toddlers are constantly eating questionable crumbs they find – it’s kind of what they do. And if your floor is so clean that your kid never finds a crumb, well, you can just leave! (Napoleon) Get out. Bye!!

 Also, just the other day I caught Levi giving River a bite of his dinner roll and proceeding to try to continue eating it himself. Cute, but gross. 

And one more thing to clarify. I would never feed my kids something that I wouldn’t eat. I’d gladly eat those m&ms off the floor myself. I guess I’m just gross like that. 
*The irony is that Tru threw up the next day but the floor-candy eater stayed healthy.*

Oh my little Levi, how are you already 20 months old?! I mean, I know how it is scientifically possible that 20 months have passed since you were born, but you are almost 2 years old! Already! 

I always thought that Levi was going to be my mellow child who listened well and didn’t pop an attitude. Because I obviously didn’t know my child, at all! This boy is my kid who gives me the worst little pout face and refuses to be serious when I reprimand him. He goes from frowning at me to smiling while I am mid-scentence telling him no. I can’t keep a straight face when he does that! Ha Ha. 😉 But all in all, he really does listen pretty well for a 1 and a half year old. 

And he is smart! So smart. A lot of stuff he knows because he follows Tru around all day and repeats everything he says and tries to do everything Tru can do. They are like peanut butter and jelly from the moment they wake up in the morning until they go to bed. Whichever one wakes up first, they are always running to the other’s bedroom looking for eachother. They do play pretty well but we have a fair amount of fighting over toys and just fighting in general. Levi’s retaliation right now is to bite Tru. Lots of times lately I hear Tru yelling “No bite, baby! No bite me!” and I run to grab Levi away. I’m not sure what to do to get him past this phase. I vaugly remember Tru doing some minor biting but I think it was a short time before he stopped. 

A few days ago we were getting ready to leave the house and I gave the boys their socks to put on. Now, Tru has been able to put on his own socks since before he was a year old. Levi? Not yet. But that’s because we never give him the opportunity to try! He’s not as set on being independent as Tru has always been so he doesn’t fight us helping him with things usually. So, he sat there struggling and Tru just couldn’t handle watching the painstaking process and he tried to help Levi. But Levi started yelling at him and running away with the socks to try again elsewhere. Tru started crying to me that he just wanted to help “baby” and I told him that Levi needed to try on his own. Tru said something like “He’s just a baby! He can’t do it. I can. I’m a big boy!” In that moment I saw the emotions I feel, coming from Tru. It’s hard watching your baby grow up. Sometimes there’s a bit of denial there. Sometimes I just want to freeze these years in time because they are already going so fast. But there is the whole other side where I am just wildly thrilled to watch them growing and learning how to do things on their own. But the most exciting part for me is watching their personalities develop….

And that is the biggest thing with Levi right now. He’s not acting like a baby much at all anymore. He’s becoming a “big boy” and it’s so fun to see! The one babyish habit that Levi hasn’t quite kicked yet is nursing. Lately he goes a day or two without and then decides he needs to check back in for a couple minutes. I can still express a bit of milk if I try. Interestingly, it looks like colostrum again. ?? I tell him no when he says “boob” a lot of the time but I really don’t care to nurse him if we are at home or if he gets hurt or is sad. 

As far as speech goes, Levi says everything he wants to say but usually just 1 or 2 words at a time. Which I guess is probably on track for his age. He gets his point across, that’s for sure! He definitely has a quiet, contemplative side but he also has a really loud voice and he’s not afraid to use it in case you didn’t hear him the first time. 😉 

I think he is starting to call himself by his name sometimes. Or rather Vevi, since that is what Tru calls him a lot. The other day my dad asked Tru “Who is that?” pointing to Levi and Tru said “That’s baby”. My dad said “I thought he had another name. Isn’t his name Vivi?” And Tru said very adamantly “No. His name is VEVI!” We also call him “nugget” quite a bit and I thought I heard Levi call himself nugget once. Poor kid probably doesn’t know his real name! I jest, I jest…. 
One of the most exciting developments recently is that Levi now says “wovou” (love you) and “wovou too”! I think he’s probably been saying it awhile but I didn’t realize that’s what he was trying to say until I told him “mommy loves you” while I had him on the changing table getting him ready for bed and he said “wovou too”. I seriously melted!! He also grabs my face and gives me kisses and hugs and is very loving with Tru also. They kiss each others boo boos and Tru will even cry more if Levi won’t kiss him better. 🙂 

Dear God, what a gift to be watching my Promised Gift learn and grow day by day. I’m so thankful for the joy of being his mother. I pray that You will protect him and watch over him. I pray that You will help us to raise him up to be loving and kind. Respectful and honest. In Jesus’ name, amen. 

This month has been pretty crazy for Levi. The poor kid actually DID break his leg on the slide at the park but it didn’t show up on the first set of xrays. He started walking with a bit of a limp 3 days later and walked for a whole week after that. He even tried to run a few times! He hardly acted like it hurt anymore but I was concerned that his foot was turned inwards a bit and I felt like his limp was getting worse. Then, 10 days after the accident on the slide, he stopped walking and would only crawl. He didn’t want to put any weight on his foot and I could tell it was really hurting again. So the following day (saturday, of course) we took him to a children’s urgent care where they did more xrays and found the break in his lower leg above the ankle. It’s not a bad break and it’s already healing but he still has to get a cast put on for awhile. For now it is in a splint and he isn’t allowed to put weight on it. The splint is bulky and he hates it because he can’t get comfortable but I hope that his leg will stop hurting now while it heals up and he can get back to being his usual active self soon. Why he was able to walk for a week on a broken leg and then suddenly realized it really hurt, I don’t know. He is one tough kid! I really just knew in my gut it was broken all along. The Dr said it isn’t unusual for some types of breaks like his to not show up until a bit after the injury when the bone starts to heal and makes the damage more visible on the xray. So I’m not upset at the first ER for missing it but I am still upset that such a little dude already has had to suffer something as painful as a broken bone. This has definitely taken his energy level down and I was starting to really worry about him since he was acting and looking so exhausted lately.

Prior to all that, Levi had his 15 month check up and looked great. 23 pounds 10 ounces in the 62nd percentile, 32 inches tall in the 78th percentile and I lost the measurement for his head so I don’t know what percentile he is in. Most of his baby chub is gone now and I really really miss it! He definitely slowed wayyyy down in growth physically but I think all his growing power went to his brain because he is so smart! Not trying to brag, he just is. 😉

This month has been a huge boom for Levi’s vocabulary. He now says around 30 words and has an absolutely ADORABLE voice. It’s so fun to hear him start talking and showing that he really pays attention to everything. Current words include: Dada, Mommy (meme), Tru-Tru, woof-woof, River, no, food, cracker, cheese, banana (nana), yogurt (go-ga), cereal, Critter, turtle, chickie, shoe, ba-ba (which means cup), bye, hi, baby, aubrey, horsey (see-see), please (pshh), thank you (choo), tractor, boob, feet, tv (vv). That’s all i can think of for now.

Levi has decided that only babies eat with their hands and he wants to use a fork since he is clearly so grown up! He does really well with a fork and has good coordination picking food up and actually getting it into his mouth most of the time. Mealtimes are somewhat hit and miss but I can usually count on him to do pretty well eating his food. His pickiness is mostly gone now except he still doesn’t like much fruit. I can’t blame him for that though because I don’t like it either. He doesn’t like milk very much which surprises me because he LOVES Enfagrow Toddler Formula in the Natural Milk flavor. Doesn’t make sense but, whatever. 😉 I still offer him milk at least once a day and he will usually take a few sips. Especially if I mix it with a small scoop of Vanilla Pediasure to bribe him with. He also prefers sippy cups over bottles which is funny because of Tru wanting bottles but his baby brother wanting cups. 😉

This little busy man has NO TIME for tv and couldn’t care less about what is on. It comes in so handy to give Tru my phone when we are at appointments and so on as he will sit there perfectly happy watching kids shows. But Levi? Nope! Not a bit. The thing that is funny though is he loves watching videos of himself and/or Truett.

This is long enough and I really just need to get it posted before it’s too late. I am yet to upload all my photos for the last couple months but I’ll try to find a few to include.

Dear God, thank You for all of Your blessings and provisions on us this month and always. Please continue to heal Levi’s leg. Thank You for helping us to figure out what was wrong with it and getting the help to heal it. In Jesus’ name, amen.

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While in Florida. His hair was super curly there the whole time. He's had a haircut since and I miss so many curls even if it was a frizzy mess mostly.

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The 2 boogers that make each other scream by putting their feet on each other in the car.

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Playing with the shovel we finally bought them on the second to last day.

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With his splint after leaving the dr

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Me? Still eating a boob? I don't know what you're talking about!

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Naps with mommy to help heal.

I have been surprised by the compassion Truett has for people lately. He gets really concerned if he thinks I am sad or upset. The other day, he could tell I was moody. He kept asking me if I was sad. A little later he came up to me and said “Mom, I pray.” and he put his hand on my head to pray for me. Awhile after that I was having my daily prayer time in my room. I usually have the door shut but I guess it wasn’t latched because Tru came in and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was praying but he must have thought I said that I was crying because he said “I get songs.” He ran out to the family room and came running back with his little piano and plopped it in front of me saying “I got songs, Mom!” Obviously he thought some songs would cheer me up. Then he laid down on the floor next to where I was kneeling and said “I wuv you.” This little boy just melts my heart! How can someone so tiny and so young have such a heart of compassion and desire to make things better? I love him so much!

Lately Levi has been running up to Tru to hug him or laying his head on his shoulder. Tru always is so happy and tells me frequently “Mommy, Baby wuvs me.” I think they both really understand now what *Love* is. 🙂 He wants to make me happy all the time and will ask me from time to time “Mommy happy?”

One day when Levi was acting up, Tru said “Baby bad.” and I explained to him that baby isn’t bad, he was just having a hard time at the moment. Then Tru told me “I a bad boy.” and it just broke my heart! I reassured him that he is not a bad boy, he is a good boy!! I’m not even sure where he got that idea as we certainly don’t tell our kids that *they* are bad when they misbehave. But I have definitely been making a point of telling them that they are good boys just randomly throughout the day or when I see them doing something nice like sharing etc. I guess I never really realized how deep of thoughts such tiny little people have! But now that I do see this with Truett, I am trying to make sure that he always feels safe and reassured in his environment.

They really understand more than we give them credit for. They might be young but that doesn’t mean they don’t understand.

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I know it's blurry but I sure love them.

It’s hard coming up with names for posts…

 

This week I started my Lovenox shots (blood thinner). Tru over heard me telling DH that I had started my shots and later Tru saw the bandaid on my belly and asked if I got a “turtle shot”. Smart little boy!

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Turtle power!

 

I signed the boys up for swim lessons! I am super excited about it. I hope they enjoy it and learn quickly. The only down-side is they are in the evenings (tired babies). But I think they will have fun. 🙂

 

I also decided to join a gym. I haven’t actually went and paid yet but I am just not able to push a 90lb stroller in 90+ degree heat and crazy humidity. Plus I only like to walk on tracks and the best one is too far to realistically go there multiple times a week. I want to work on my core strength. My legs and arms are quite strong, it’s my back and abs that feel weak. My sister wants to join with me so, Yay for a work out buddy! 🙂

 

I’ve been working on my yard and gardens pretty much every day. I am really happy with how everything is looking. 🙂

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My tacky watering system for transplants. Seems to be helping them along. This is a lilac.

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A splash of color from my flower beds.

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The pansies on my porch.

 

And of course, we are still enjoying our Critter pet. He’s fun to watch and both boys love him. Levi squeals with delight every time he sees Critter up and moving. 🙂

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“Dank you for dis food.”

I was beginning to think Levi would not be a self-weaning baby, and I was not so secretly FINE with that. I am in no hurry to wean him yet and he was adamant in his desire to nurse alllll day and had gotten even more attached to the boob in the last month since he learned to ask for it by patting my chest, tugging my shirt and occasionally making a “buh” sound. We are talking, I would be walking through the store pushing the cart and he’s in the seat patting my boob area and crying. (Less weird than it sounds).

Well, suddenly he is not interested. He stopped asking me frequently to nurse and started shaking his head “no” and even making his sound for “no” when I would ask if he wanted to nurse. Usually, I can ask him from another room if he wants a boob and he comes crawling as fast as he can.

This boob rejection started 4 days ago and it’s getting worse. Today I have almost no milk and am hardly feeling let-downs. On the occasions he does ask to nurse, he pops off before any milk even has a chance to come down.

Part of this is probably because he is obsessed with practicing walking! He can walk but chooses to crawl most of the time. He walked from the TV to the couch today which is across the room. He is getting really good at it but he lacks confidence just yet to give up crawling entirely. But he practices all day! Maybe he is letting go of nursing as a way to assert his new-found independence. Or maybe he’s just tired of it. And outgrowing it.

Honestly, I thought he may well be coming up on age 2 and me having to wean him. Instead, he’s doing it on his own. It’s a good thing, but also really hard for me. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to nurse a baby again and our breastfeeding relationship has been so great. I’ll miss that bonding time terribly!! I savor that time to snuggle Levi and I absolutely love that my body feeds him. I didn’t know if breastfeeding would work for me (us) and I’m so thankful that it did and so sad to see it end. It was hard when Tru weaned but I was pregnant again already so that just made sense. This though, this just feels hard. I know some people might not understand but it’s just the way I feel and that’s that.

My cycle was regular pretty much right away after having Tru. It may have been off a day or two but not by much. This time around though, it’s sporadic. The first 2 were 36 days apart and this month I was 10 days late! Negative tests after AF was late aside from 1 that was most likely a dye run. (IC, had a bad dent in it.) I didn’t track anything this month or keep track of CD or ovulation. But I was due to start Christmas and AF didn’t come until today. Was a little bummed after starting to get my hopes up yesterday with that wacky test. Oh well, it was obviously not my month. It’s ok. But I hope AF will quit playing tricks on me if I’m not pregnant. As nice as it is to delay the ugly lady, it’s also a pain to have to keep testing every few days *just in case* since I would have to start Lovenox asap if I were actually pregnant. My milk supply is low enough that I’m surprised my hormones are still that off. How long did it take before your cycles evened out post partum?

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