Archives for category: natural pregnancy after infertility

How far along? 31 weeks 5 days (9-22-17) Yes, I missed my 30 week update. Last week was crazy! I’ll try to do a little recap below.

 
Symptoms? Queasy, breathless, some swelling that comes and goes. Restless legs and the occasional grab of round ligament pain. Pain in the front of my pelvis…. I know there are a few other things but I’m drawing a blank right now….. I guess I still feel pretty good. 🙂

 
Weight? I forgot to weigh myself today. I think about +33-34ish. It’s hard to tell with the swelling. I was +31 and then dropped to +29, then up to +34 overnight and have been bouncing up and down. All I know is, I am definitely feeling the extra pounds!

 
Sleep? Not so good. For some reason, Zane will oftentimes push his feet out really hard if I try to lay on my right side. (I looked back on my updates with Levi and he didn’t like me laying on my left side.) It’s almost like he isn’t comfortable that way. So I have been sleeping mostly on my left but waking up on my back a lot.

 
Exercise? I got in 2 days last week but only 1 this week. It’s getting harder to motivate myself to exercise instead of taking advantage of the boys’ naptime to catch up on some rest myself!

 
Cravings/aversions? I am definitely feeling more aversions to foods. I am not able to eat as much at a time (FINALLY!!!!!) and lots of stuff just doesn’t sound as good. I am totally ok with that as I feel it is a good thing at this stage of pregnancy (and weight gain). 😉

 
Bump? Oh boy! I feel like it stayed modestly sized for quite awhile after the initial bump poppage happened. But now it is definitely feeling larger and heavier and much lower! Next week is the start of our weekly (for now) NSTs. The Dr asked me at my appointment last week if I wanted to do them once a week or twice. I told her, let’s start with once and if my anxiety gets the best of me or if anything comes up, we’ll go to twice a week. She was happy with that plan. 🙂 I also asked her if she is comfortable with me going to my due date and she said no, she wants to induce by 39 weeks. I was/am hoping to avoid induction (and definitely hoping we can safely birth baby without a C-section) and I know my Dr would much prefer I go into labor on my own as well. So here’s hoping that labor starts on it’s own before the induction date if baby is ready and happy to come out.

 

 

Ok, so last week was so busy and I’m already forgetting the majority of how it went…. Sunday: Went to church, stopped at the store so I could buy some glue on nails (to match the dress I bought for maternity pictures), picked up a pizza for lunch and drove to the park for our family/maternity pictures. After that was done, we went to my parent’s house (my mom had been overseas on a trip for almost 3 weeks at that point) and I helped Dad get stuff cleaned up. He had been working on the brakes on our truck since they had went out on me a few weeks prior, so we took our truck home.
Monday: I sat around the house all day worrying about the baby because he hadn’t moved much. I debated whether I should go get checked out and finally by 7pm or so, I decided to go to triage for peace of mind. DH stayed home with the boys, which was good because I didn’t get home till midnight. Baby was fine, obviously, but they did comment on his heart arrhythmia which was very pronounced that day. The Dr said to follow up with them about it. They also checked his fluid which was good at 12.1cm.
Tuesday: Up bright and early for my check up and growth ultrasound. My brother went with me to watch the kids because I didn’t have anyone who could babysit. The ultrasound measured baby’s fluid around 13cm. Zane weighed approx 3lbs 14oz. I was shocked that he is that big already but the tech said that was *only* the 61st percentile and wasn’t too big. They watched his heart for a long time because of the arrhythmia. Unfortunately, the Dr didn’t have the ultrasound report before I had my visit with her, so I don’t know if everything looked good or not. I’m hoping that it is all well. I mentioned that the soles of my feet have been itchy so she sent me for labs and they came back good. 🙂
Wednesday: I took the kids to story time in the morning and we hung out at home the rest of the day. In the evening, I was just getting ready to start supper when DH called on his way home. That’s rather unusual so I knew immediately something must be wrong. He did, in fact, go off the road into a ditch. The roads were wet because it had been raining all day. He did a 360 through a soybean field and took out a road sign. Thank the Lord, he was not hurt at all! He missed a power line pole by just a few feet. That could have been significantly worse! His back was a little sore but that was it. His car looks worse for wear with the passenger door smashed and the mirror missing, but aside from ripping the brake lines out, it is fine. He managed to get it out of the ditch and into a very sweet family’s driveway. The man helped him fix the brakes so he could drive home. We were so thankful for his help and for God keeping DH safe. 🙂
Thursday and Friday: Are totally coming up blank in my memory… Oh dear…. OH! I remember now… I cleaned for 6 hours straight on Friday. I went into full-on nesting mode and everything that seemed *gross* had to be cleaned. (Note: Everything seemed gross.) DH got sucked into my cleaning frenzy and we didn’t eat supper until super late. But the house was clean(er) and I was happy(er)…..Until the next day when I woke up so sore I could hardly function and had to take Tylenol just to move. Which wasn’t good because…
Saturday: The big walk/fundraiser for our local pregnancy center. They provide so much incredible help and resources to the moms, dads and babies/young children in our area. I didn’t know how I would make it for the whole walk, but I did! DH played music at the event also. Afterwards we went home and relieved my MIL from babysitting and I laid down for a short but extremely needed nap. Then we went to DH’s cousin’s wedding. I was wiped out at the end of that day!

 

 

Shew! That was longer than I realized. This week was less crazy but still a little busy. My sister came and stayed a couple days with us and babysat Levi while I took Tru to his follow up with the Pediatrician. He gained a half pound and hasn’t had an unexplained fever or belly pain in awhile, so we are supposed to go back in December to check in. 🙂 The church had prayed over Tru a fever weeks ago and he has been doing great. We very much want to continue on with him feeling better!! The Dr just said to keep him on stool softener for now. He is back on moderate amounts of dairy and not taking Prevacid. 🙂
We did a little shopping after the appointment since it was just me and Tru. I plan to have a one-on-one day with each of the boys in the next week or so. They desperately need to have my full attention for a day! I can’t believe how mature Tru is lately. Like today, we were going to a little street fair type of thing and he asked me if there would be rides there and if so, would that make his hat blow off. I was surprised that he thought ahead like that! He moved to a big boy bed last night and was so excited about it! He was asking to go to bed a full hour+ before bedtime. Awhile later he decided he didn’t like it and was scared, so I went and snuggled him for a bit. He still couldn’t sleep so I promised him we would go buy a nightlight for his room today. I arranged all his 500(ish) stuffed animals around his feet like he likes to have them and he finally fell asleep. He woke up this morning and announced he likes his new bed and wants to sleep in it tonight! Levi asked him “Why?” (of course!) and Tru said “All my animals are waiting for me.” SO CUTE!!! We went and bought him and Levi both a nightlight for their rooms and they were even excited to take naps. Score!! 🙂 The plan was to get Levi moved to the crib-converted-to-toddler-bed tonight, but I didn’t get it done yet. Maybe tomorrow.

 

Ok, this is getting too long.

 

Dear God, thank You for your protection and provision for us these last two weeks. Thank You for keeping DH safe. Please continue to watch over and protect each and every one of us. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

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How far along? 23 weeks 6 days (7-29-30) Just hours away from viability! I was reading online the other day and a girl who is due around the same time as me commented that she is almost to the third trimester and I was thinking “Well, that’s still awhile away really.” And then today it hit me, that’s only a few weeks! (3-4, depending on who you talk to.) Like, tomorrow is 6 months! (Also, depending on who you talk to.) That’s just…. incredible.

 

 

 

Symptoms? Lightheaded several days this week. Random, short bouts of queasiness. Restless legs. Braxton Hicks contractions, which are surprisingly strong at times. Brings back thoughts of labor like a tidal wave!

 

 

 

Weight? +22

 

 

 

Sleep? I realized I cut this question out without meaning to. Until recently, it’s been about as good or bad as it usually is, with a few extra wake ups to pee. But the last few nights, Truett keeps waking up randomly and not being able to sleep. And in turn, once I’m back to bed, I can’t fall back to sleep as quickly as usual. It takes at least 3 to 4 pillows to be comfortable on my side at night or else I get pelvic pain. With my pillows, I’m fine. It takes a bit of arranging but it works. 🙂

 

 

 

Cravings/aversions? Nothing new. But I’ve got Truett and Levi both begging for freezes now. 😉

 

 

 

Baby buys? I had $30 off in coupons to a local store that sells baby clothes etc, so I stopped in there this week and bought Zane 3 outfits and a 2 pack of stretchy baby blankets for around $11 altogether! I was so excited. So were the boys because they love snuggling the new blankets and “trying them out”. Haha. Levi desperately wanted to try on the baby clothes and stripped down to try to put the pants on. Of course, that didn’t work too well. 😀 I also picked up another 2 pack of thermal baby blankets. And I got white shirts for Tru, Levi and myself and I’m hoping to use them in our maternity photo shoot…. although, the photographer didn’t get back with me on the date yet so…

 

 

 

Bump? Baby’s kicks are so much more forceful this week! I think I said that last week as well but this week, they catch me by surprise. He’s started those lovely “cervix kicks”. (Not sure if that’s actually what is going on, but that is what it feels like.) He gets my belly shaking around and sometimes he’s sticking out more on one side, usually the right. I feel like my belly is always changing shape, size and height but I’m pretty sure he’s still breech since the majority of his strong kicks are in my low abdomen. But the hiccups are also low down so… who knows. This morning, DH was talking to Zane with his face against my belly and Zane popped him right in the nose several times. It got us quite to laughing. I love those bonding moments. 🙂

 

 

 

Exercise? I used the elliptical 3 days this week! I increased my time to 30 minutes and I feel good keeping it there now. That’s enough time that I am sweaty and ready for a break, but not feeling over-tired. I’ve been taking advantage of the boys naptime to shower, have Bible study and prayer, maybe rest or catch up on laundry, depending on the day and to exercise. Which is a total change from the first trimester when I couldn’t keep my eyes open once they laid down. I am happy to have (most) of my energy back. 🙂

 

 

 

I think I have hit the “obviously pregnant” stage as people are no longer hesitant to ask about the pregnancy. Yesterday, a lady pulled up beside me while I was getting the boys in the van and asked “Are you having another boy?” And today, another lady asked me if it was a boy or a girl. I’m quite fine with these types of questions and it doesn’t offend me personally, but I know some women find it super annoying.

 

 

 

Levi has been a bit more clingy to me lately. He wants me to pick him up and carry him around sometimes, which is a bit difficult since he’s about 30 pounds now. He also runs up to me and says “Kiss you” multiple times a day and kisses me. He climbs in my lap many times a day to “smuggle you”, but only for a minute before he gets bored and runs off again. And he is very attached to the baby already, talking about him all the time and asking to kiss him or hug him or feel him kick. Levi was singing in the van on the way home last night “I wanna hold the baby”. He also told me he is going to help with the baby and help potty train him. 😉

 

 

 

Truett, on the other hand, is not at all interested in feeling the baby or kissing my belly. He will talk about Zane quite often but if I ask him if he wants to hold him when he’s born, Tru usually says no. And if I ask him if he is going to help with the baby, he also says no. But he is usually doing this little goofy smile when he says it so I think he is excited in his own way but not as interested in the process as Levi is. Which, of course, is perfectly normal and understandable at the age of 3! I have found it so interesting to see and hear the boys’ reactions to having another baby on the way!

 

 

 

Dear God, thank You for another beautiful week and for the wonderful weather we have been able to enjoy and the time with our families. Thank You for all of Zane’s precious little kicks and for this amazing opportunity to experience pregnancy again and carry another miraculous little life. Please watch over and bless him as he continues to grow. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

 

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These are the outfits that we bought.

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Tru quickly claimed this blanket for watching tv on. 😉

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And Levi chose this “bassetball” blanket to be wrapped up and “smuggled” in. 😉

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My sister bought me these gladiolas last year and they have been absolutely gorgeous this summer. I’ve had some white and some pink ones bloom. Love them!

So, last week I typed up a nice update for 16 weeks, and my computer ate it. Second time it has done that to me. So I have no 16 week update or picture since we were too busy to take one last weekend. 😦

We went to the work picnic for DH’s job last weekend and had a blast! The kids rode on lots of kiddie rides and really enjoyed themselves. It was a long day and I was exhausted that evening and still pretty worn out the next day. But thankfully the weather was pretty cool, and with lots of hydration, I felt really good all day and only had a few minutes where I felt lightheaded. When that happened I just went and got more water. It was so fun to watch the boys enjoying the rides. 🙂

And also lost in the 16 weeks update is the news that we chose a name for our new little boy. Zane Trey; because Zane means God’s gracious gift and Trey means third. Zane was actually a name we considered for Levi and we like it for it’s meaning most of all, but also, we can call him Z. And how cute is that!! 🙂

How far along? 17 weeks 5 days (as of 6-16-17)
Symptoms? Feeling really good the last couple weeks. My only real complaint is restless legs syndrome. Which I have regardless of pregnancy, but it does seem to get worse during pregnancy. Right now it is really constant. I’m doing lots of stretches to try to help it, and to some extent, it does seem to help… or at least give temporary relief. Aside from that, I am at that stage where I feel pretty much myself.  *Side note: I skipped taking unisom the night I wrote this update and I was quite queasy the next day. So I’m definitely staying on that for now.*

 

Sometimes I look down at my belly and I’m kind of caught by surprise. Wow! There is actually a little person in there, growing and living their life. Stretching, kicking, rolling, sucking his thumb, sleeping and waking up, having hiccups… even going pee, if everything I’m reading is correct for this stage. That’s amazing! Because most of the time, I don’t really feel like all of this is going on in there. I mean, I know it is, but I’m just going about my day, rushing to get stuff done, focused on a million other things…. and I look down at my belly and I’m just struck by the wonder and the miracle of life. It’s truly a gift. Every moment.

 
Weight? I actually forgot to weigh myself today. Earlier this week I was +11 pounds.
Bump? Some days, the activity I feel is still pretty minimal. I’ve had a few days where baby just moved all day and then I’d hardly feel him. I still have to be sitting or laying pretty still to really notice the movements. But one day this week I looked at my belly when he was kicking and I could actually see my belly move! I think it got lost in the update my computer ate, but DH felt him kick once by surprise. He put his hand on my belly to shield the baby when we were all playing on the floor and he was afraid one of the boys would accidently knock my belly. Well, DH got quite the surprise when baby kicked him! 🙂

 
Baby and maternity buys? I’ve started buying a few more maternity/nursing items. I had almost no summer maternity clothes since I was so small with Tru, and with Levi, I was pregnant during the winter. So, I’ve ordered a few more shirts online to come in next week. I hope they fit! I have bought 1 pair of capris and I’m making do with those and maxi skirts, but ideally, I hope to get a couple more pairs or maxi dresses. I’ve bought lots of nursing bras. I found a bunch on clearance for $2-3.50!! Talk about a bargain! I don’t know how much more the girls are going to grow though… I may have to switch entirely to stretchy sleep bras full-time like I did when I had Levi. I just couldn’t find comfortable nursing bras anywhere over a D. I’m super picky though.

 
Cravings? No use talking about aversions now. 🙂 Thankfully! I’m still hitting the salads almost daily. That’s about the only thing… oh… bean burritos. I love those! 🙂

 
Best moment? This morning I asked Levi “Why is my belly getting so fat?” And he smiled and pointed at it and said “There’s a baby in you body!!” which just melted my heart. I think he actually gets it now. I mean, I’m sure it confuses his little 2 year old self, but he knows there is a baby in there and it’s growing and it kicks my belly. I’m really looking forward to the boys being able to feel the baby but so far, they don’t have the patience to hold their hand there that long.

 

Next appointment? This coming week at 18+3 is the anatomy scan and check up. It’s over 5 weeks between appointments this time but I feel like it went pretty fast! I do want to ask the Dr about the baby’s heartrate. I have recorded a clip for her where it’s skipping beats. I remember the boys both doing that and it resolved, but just to be safe, I want to run that by her since this is happening all the time.

 

I really want to get an update posted about Truett. I decided to stop monthly updates at 3 years old, but I feel like I need to do an annual update or something. This little boy is growing and changing so much all the time and I feel like I’m cheating myself by not writing all his cuteness down. And I need to do a general life update too!

Dear God, thank You for another wonderful week. For how well I’ve felt and for all the kicks and movement I’ve been able to enjoy this week. I pray that this sweet baby will continue to grow and be healthy and strong. I pray that our appointment and ultrasound will go very well. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

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DH keeps cutting these pictures too short so the bottom of my belly is hardly in the shot… must talk to him about that. 😉

How far along? 9 weeks 5 days (4-21-17)
Symptoms? I’ve had both good and bad days this week with the nausea. My best time is still in the morning most days. Which seems silly because it’s called “morning” sickness, after all. 😉 I gradually feel worse as the day progresses and by bedtime, I’m ready to fall asleep to get some relief. Some nights I feel sick throughout the night but not always. I know I followed this pattern with both of the boys but to a lesser extent. I’m having some minor breast tenderness again. It seems that they are growing some more. Fine by me! 😉 Still pretty emotional – I can cry about practically anything – happy, sad, totally neutral, it makes no difference. The acne is way out of hand! Enjoyng my second go at my teenager face. HA! Still a bit more tired than usual. I think that’s pretty much it for this week. 


Weight? After freaking out last week about being up 4 pounds for the pregnancy, this week I was surprised to see that I actually lost 2 pounds so I’m +2 at 137lbs. That feels better for how far along I am. 

Bump? I think it looks smaller this week. Probably in part because of the Miralax finally working. 😉 Haha. TMI, sorry. I gave up on my regular jeans around 7 weeks because I just really don’t like that tight feeling on my belly. But the maternity capris I pulled out are still way too big although I’ve worn them a couple times with a band around then to keep them up. Otherwise, I’m enjoying the looseness of maxi skirts. 🙂 

Sleep? Not as good as it was. I’m tossing and turning alot and having so many weird dreams. I have been taking a nap during the day when I get the chance. 

Cravings/aversions? This week I only want to eat salad. At first it HAD to have Italian dressing. Now it HAS to have Ranch. I’m not even sure I want the salad as much as the dressing, although the crunch is really satisfying. I could go for a Coke Freeze anytime! That’s about it. All else is gross. 

Gender? Everyone is still enjoying specualting. It’s funny how pretty much EVERYONE is sure it’s a girl. Some people have flat out told me they are praying it’s a girl! I am being 100% honest when I tell you that I really do not have a prefence. We do have a girl name picked out (for 9 years now!) but nothing so far for a boy. But if we have a boy, we have absolutely everything we need. (Clothes, toys etc.) It just really doesn’t matter to me. My boys are great and I enjoy being their mom. I can’t imagine it being better or worse to parent a girl…. though I think it’d be really fun to have a daughter. 

My appointment with the new OB is in 3 days. I am nervous but also excited to see how we get along. I decided to write down a list of what I usually have vs what I would probably feel comfortable with as far as monitoring goes. I plan to ask her if we can work something out along those lines. I figure that if the MFM practice thought it was necessary, then we really should keep at least most of it. Not to mention, I just know myself and I would feel totally out of the loop and anxious. Here’s the list… After 12 weeks, I usually have: 

  • Anatomy ultrasound at 20 weeks w/ cervical length 
  • Growth ultrasound every 4 weeks until birth 
  • NSTs twice weekly after 32 weeks 
  • Weekly AFI after 32 weeks 
  • Bi-weekly BPP after 32 weeks 

Here’s what I think I would feel comfortable with: 

  • Obviously they would still do anatomy ultrasound at 20 weeks but I also want the cervical length, mostly because of the damage that Levi’s birth could have caused and I’ve never had a super long cervix. 
  • Growth ultrasound every 4 weeks. I really don’t think I could see myself being comfortable without this. 
  • NSTs once a week after 34 weeks. I figure that weekly appointments start around that time anyway. We might as well do an NST. I can’t imagine being comfortable with no NSTs at all. 
  • Bi-weekly BPP. I figure with this, I won’t be too concerned about AFIs, mostly because they proved highly inaccurate with Levi, although neccessary with Tru. 

My guess is the OB is going to think I’m crazy, but I’m ok with that. She will have to understand that I have had way extreme babying during my previous pregnancies and that is simply what I’m used to/comfortable with and it’s really not that excessive….. is it? If all else fails, I already scheduled an intake appointment with my old practice AND made sure that the Dr who was my primary before (the one who delivered Levi) will no longer be my primary and I don’t ever have to have an appointment with her. So that’s all taken care of. 🙂 

Dear God, thank You for another week of pregnancy with this sweet little baby. Please continue to watch over and sustain it’s life according to Your will. Please help things to continue to go smoothly. In Jesus’ name, amen. 

Haha! That acne is cracking me up!


Have you ever stopped to notice how pretty dandelions are? I hadn’t until the other day. So vibrant! And also, so tasty! I’ve already fixed them 3 times this spring. Yum! 🙂


I bought this beautiful Easter Lily the day after Easter on markdown. I hope it comes back next year! I love my lilies. And incidentally, we had a great Easter but I never got around to posting about it. Oops!

Yesterday I had my second ultrasound. It went great! Baby has nearly doubled in size from 10 days prior. Still measuring 5 days ahead! And with a beautiful heartrate of 166. 🙂 Thank You so much dear Lord! Please continue to bless this pregnancy. In Jesus’ name. 

The SCH is still very much there. Maybe even a bit bigger. But it looks like it’s healing and the Dr seemed very unconcerned at this point. He kept saying that everything looks good. 🙂
I seem to be starting with a UTI despite daily suppression with Macrodantin. So the Dr switched me to Macrobid for a week. 

Aside from that, he said I can stop progesterone support at 10 weeks if my bloodwork comes back good. I’m still waiting on that to come back but I’m definitely looking forward to weaning off of that. The prometrium is so icky and messy, though I’m mostly used to it now. I usually take the 2 pills at 11pm once I’m laying in bed. Then I take the next dose of 1 pill at 7am and try to stay laying down at least another hour. Then I take the PIO shot in the evening. I was taking it at 3pm but it was getting difficult giving it to myself as my butt cheeks are kind of hard to reach myself with a 1.5″ needle. 😉

I’m still taking Zofran, usually 4mg around an hour before getting out of bed. If I can make it through the day on just 1 dose, that makes me happy. 🙂

Since I’ve been released from my RE’s office, I have to find an ob. I am very hesitant to go back to the practice that delivered both of my boys. On the one hand, they are familiar to me and I’m mostly comfortable there. But then, Levi’s birth was a huge hours long battle between me and the ob who just couldn’t comprehend an uncomplicated natural vbac. She pressured me for hours to get an epidural (Nearly shouting “Get the EPIDURAL!” at me) even though I pacified her by getting the line placed sans meds. I wasn’t in enough pain at that point to want the meds and the only reason she wanted me to take the epidural was so she could speed up my already great labor with pitocin. In the end, and only by the grace of God, I avoided another dose of pitocin. After the birth, the Dr pulled on the umbillical cord trying to remove the placenta just seconds after I delivered the baby. I begged her not to but she continued. Whether that caused the placenta to tear and then become a piece of retained placenta followed by hemorhage or not, who knows?! But it didn’t help. I almost lost my uterus. They were this close >•< to doing a hysterectomy to stop the bleeding. The best part? I have it all on video. 

So all that to say, if I go back there, I’ve requested a different Dr for my primary. But here’s the thing, that is an MFM group. And aside from taking blood thinner, I’m certainly hoping that this pregnancy is not going to be high risk. I’m not sure how I’ll handle my anxiety if I go to a regular ob practice though. I probably won’t get nsts or growth scans or afi checks. And if you remember, we found out Tru was in distress at one of my nst/afi checks and delivered him via c-section right away. So going without that will scare me, because it could have gone completely different without that appointment. But on the other hand, if I find a compassionate dr, I’m confident that we can work together to find something that fits for us all. And the bottom line is just placing my trust in God. That He will make sure we get any testing we need and provide for a safe, healthy pregnancy and birth. 

SO, today I scheduled an appointment with a regular ob. This time, when/if I’m met with ignorance (as I have been in both previous pregnancies) and am told to stop my Lovenox, I have my wonderful, knowledgable hematologist to back me up and say that it is absolutely neccessary!! She will gladly send them a letter confirming that my combo of clotting disorders makes treatment a no-brainer. BUT, because I’m afraid this regular ob may not work out for me, I also called the MFM group to set up an intake appointment. The descision remains to be made until after my first appointment with the regular ob in 2 weeks. If we click and I love them, I just might stay there. They deliver at the hospital I had the boys at which is an absolute neccessity because that hospital has been so wonderful to us in the past. Very pro-family and focus on keeping mom and baby together. They are also very helpful with breastfeeding etc. 

Shew! I had no intention of writing a book! I guess I just needed to write it all down and sort through everything. If you made it this far, you rock! Not only that but you probably also think I’m crazy. 😉 

I *think* I ovulated yesterday. I used CBD Advanced OPKs this month and got my flashing smiley face (high fertility) on CD 14 and solid smiley (peak fertility) on CD 15. I definitely felt like I was ovulating yesterday. My ovaries hurt SO BAD! Especially the left side. 
TMI but my RE said to BD on days 10, 12, 14, and 16. I was totally not going to follow that schedule because of using the OPKs and not wanting to make things happen if the mood wasn’t there. But it so happened that it just worked out that way. 
Anyhow, I still have tenderness in my ovaries today so I don’t know what that means. Hopefully nothing sinister. My LP is usually 13 days so… now, we wait. Lord if it’s Your will! 

Remember how how I said that maybe I had ovarian cysts that were preventing my cycle from coming? Well, it finally did come on CD 47 (!!!) which is the latest I have ever been without being pregnant. But I really don’t know why it was so late. 

On CD 44 I went to see my RE. We basically had a pre-conception consultation and talked about the possible cysts and ran blood work to check where all my hormones are falling at now. Progesterone was elevated so I definitely did ovulate, according to the Dr, which I was almost certain I had. And I am about 100% certain I didn’t ovulate late yet I was 3 weeks late to start….? All the other tests came back within normal levels. (Testosterone, thyroid, FSH etc) 
They did an ultrasound while I was there and the Dr asked if I had ever been diagnosed with PCOS because my ovaries almost looked that way. Even I could definitely see lots of black spots (cysts) on them. I told him I hadn’t been diagnosed with that before (thankfully!) so he ordered AMH on the blood work as well. It came back at 6.87ng/ml which is within normal range but actually higher than when I was 22. ETA: I am actually a little confused about this. Higher AMH is usually thought to be good because it points to higher ovarian reserve, but I’ve also read that it can indicate PCOS…  He didn’t say anything about the cysts making my cycle late though so maybe my theory was bogus. The Dr didn’t seem overly concerned about the cysts…? I am supposed to follow up in Feb. 

He asked if I wanted to give a couple cycles of medicated TI a try before doing a SA and possibly moving on to other treatment (I am thinking if we move on to more advanced treament, it would probably be AT LEAST another year). I decided to go ahead and try Femara 2.5mg for 2 months. Because, why not…. If he thinks it’s worth a try then I might as well try it. I opted not to take Clomid because I had such a horrible time on it last time I tried it 6 years ago. I’ve never tried Femara before but I am on day 2 of 5 now. I guess we will see how it goes. I have realistic expectations but I also know what my God can do so I am leaving it in His hands. So, yeah, that’s where I am at right now. Very thankful for good test results! 🙂 

Three years ago when I started this blog, I was part-way through my second IVF cycle and desperate to make a connection with someone who could relate to what I was going though. I had plenty of family and friends who did their utmost to be there for me and who were/are so supportive and loving and really helped to give me strength through what had been a long 4.5 year battle with infertility. But as much as I loved and appreciated their support (and still am so thankful for their support and prayers and desire to understand) sometimes I just wanted to talk to someone who understood. Someone who I didn’t have to explain things to and didn’t have to try not to offend with my anger. And I had things I wanted to share with others too! Support I wanted to give; to be that listening ear. God, in His unwavering faithfulness carried me through and I wanted to share that with everyone. If it wasn’t for God, I wouldn’t have made it 4.5 years without a single friend who really knew or understood what I was feeling.

I had found forums where I could discuss things with “cycle buddies” and didn’t have to explain procedures to and I had seen that a few of them had blogs. I started reading a blog or two and thought, I’d like to try that. But I really didn’t dream I would ever have over a hundred followers reading my own blog! I just really needed a place to journal my feelings and progress and hopefully find a few friends who could relate. WOW, you all really came through!! The sense of community and support was overwhelming and it really helped to lift my spirit during a tough time. Then, once I was treading the new, frightening yet exciting waters of pregnancy after infertility, I found a whole new world of support I was not expecting I would even need, let alone, find. Pregnancy after infertility is different. At least it certainly has been for me and I know a lot of others who would vouch for that as well as parenting after infertility. I had a whole different set of fears and struggles that I wasn’t aware would come up and I found a whole community here waiting to share their support once again. I couldn’t thank you enough.

I know that word *support* keeps coming up… because that’s what it’s all about! Thank you for reading along and sharing your stories and for letting me share mine. 🙂

I am officially the most pregnant I have ever been. I crossed that bridge 2 days ago. I told DH that I now feel “overdue”. I can only imagine how much I will hate myself for saying that now if I actually do go overdue.

 

I have crossed the line from uncomfortable most of the time to miserable all of the time, which I have heard is actually a good thing because it means baby is close to coming. I hope that is the case! I am so unbelievably tired – more tired than first trimester even. And the belly is so very very heavy. I am lightheaded and actually started to pass out yesterday as I am having a hard time keeping my blood pressure high enough. I know that is a much less scary problem than having it too high though so I really can’t complain about that. It’s harder and harder to breathe. Ya know, normal end of pregnancy stuff that makes you just tired enough of being pregnant that you are ready to get that baby out! It’s a little extra motivation otherwise I think some of us would put it off until everything is ready, which could be never considering how slow I move. But I am certainly ready to be done and have this little guy in my arms. Especially after he gave me a little scare yesterday and had a prolonged drop in heart rate during my NST when I had a rather strong contraction. I was sent for a BPP (bio physical profile) on the baby and it came back good. So we were sent home but I was totally ready to be sent for a delivery… His fluid has stayed great at 17.5 last week and 15. something yesterday.

 

I have set up the co-sleeper, I just need to wash the mattress and sheet and that is all done. I need to put the car seat in the vehicle. I still have a few items that I need to add to our hospital bags but it’s not really a big deal if I don’t. I need to sanitize the pump and pacis. (I still haven’t tried pumping. After Levi’s heart rate dropped with my contraction yesterday, I am a bit afraid to purposely start anything that could be too strong for baby.) I need to set up the pack and play and I have a few minor cleaning projects that need done but are not really all that important. I feel like I have the nesting bug but no energy. Take it from me, don’t feel silly to get those things done early. You may not feel up to doing them at the last minute.

 

The baby sprinkle was perfect and so much fun! We just had a great day. I actually got quite a lot of baby gifts which wasn’t at all necessary but so very appreciated nonetheless. I counted up how many diapers we have for Levi now and what we got along with what I had already been stock piling, we have 773 diapers! That should get us through a week or two… 😉

 

I have an appointment tomorrow with my primary OB to talk about a “birth plan” which I am pretty sure is code for “scheduling a c-section” since my group practice does not allow birth plans. (They even have you sign a form at your first visit stating that you understand that birth plans are not allowed.) I am looking forward to getting that appointment done though because in the event that a c-section does happen, I have a lot of requests that I want to make and I need to do that now, not at the last minute.

 

How far along? 37 weeks 4 days

How big is the baby? Probably about 7.5lbs if the ultrasound is at all accurate.

Total weight gain/loss? About +33.

Sleep? Better than expected but have a hard time falling back to sleep.

Best moment this week? This week has been a bit rough. But the chiropractor helped my inner thigh pain SO MUCH this week. That was pretty great. 🙂

Symptoms? Pretty much what I wrote above. Also getting very nauseous. And some pretty bad hemorrhoids. Even that word is disgusting…

Food cravings? Nothing. I feel sick. I have been eating a lot less and nothing really sounds that great. Except chicken noodle soup…

Food aversions? Nothing in particular.

Gender? Baby boy Levi.

Labor signs? Probably not actually labor signs but what the heck… I have been cramping. It’s probably all that kale I ate. I am nauseous. Probably because there is a baby pushing on my stomach. Nothing exciting. I am supposed to have a cervical check again tomorrow. I don’t expect any progress as I am having no increased discharge etc.

What I miss? I am at the point where I miss my skinnier self because it’s so much easier to get around. I miss sleeping on my belly and back. I miss being able to move around quickly and I miss being able to breathe. It’s all worth it but I am starting to feel a little too cow-like.

What I’m looking forward to? Holding my Levi. 🙂 Hearing his first cry. Labor as long as it isn’t scary. Seeing Truett meet Levi. Being done traveling to the Dr 2-3 times a week.

Milestones? The most pregnant I have ever been. Over 9 months pregnant now. 🙂

Bump? It hurts and it’s stretched to what cannot possibly stretch any more. Oh wait, yes I guess it can. How in the world do bellies stretch for twin, triplet and even quad pregnancies? I look at how huge mine is and I just can’t imagine it getting bigger!

 

Same outfit that I wore with Tru at same gestation. 37+2.

Same outfit that I wore with Tru at same gestation. 37+2.

You can't see the front on. It's too scary and I think some people might find all the excessive bruising gross.

You can’t see the front on pic we took. It’s too scary and I think some people might find all the excessive bruising gross. Can you believe how big I am? It scares me and makes me laugh. 

The babies wanted in on the fun too. They threw the paper all over the floor. It was so cute. :)

The babies wanted in on the fun. They threw the paper all over the floor. It was so cute. 🙂

That is a HUGE box of diapers.

That is a HUGE box of diapers.

We were never looking at the same camera at the same time. It was totally my fault.

We were never looking at the same camera at the same time. It was totally my fault.

I have some serious imagine issues about my size from this angle...

I have some serious imagine issues about my size from this angle…

Tru ate a billion pickles and paraded around in his "awesome big brother" shirt that my SIL made him.

Tru ate a billion pickles and paraded around in his “awesome big brother” shirt that my SIL made him.

Some of the action.

Some of the action.

One of the guest tables.

One of the guest tables.

Up close of the duckies.

Up close of the duckies.

Our cake. It was as delicious as it looks. SOOO good and moist. It was sad to cut the ultrasound pics though.

Our cake. It was as delicious as it looks. SOOO good and moist. It was sad to cut the ultrasound pics though.

Our food table. I actually FORGOT to bring the vegi tray... Wow.

Our food table. I actually FORGOT to bring the vegi tray… Wow.

A blurry picture of the present table.

A blurry picture of the present table.

 

Dear God, thank You for all of the blessings You have provided for us during this pregnancy. For the sweet baby sprinkle that we got to have to celebrate our babies. For bringing us to this point of pregnancy. I pray that You will continue to bless us all throughout the labor and birth of this sweet little one. Please continue to watch over, bless, guard and protect him. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

Oh boy… I had quite a day yesterday. I had my 36 week check up and the Dr checked for dilation. After groping my tonsils for a few seconds, she said “Yeah, no dilation.” And I am pretty sure my face just went all weird because she started immediately trying to make me feel better. “You could go into labor today or it could be a few weeks!” Oh please. I could go into labor today – That’s a real laugh! I was so surprised that I had no dilation. Contractions have been waking me up at night several times a night for at least a week now. I have so much stabbing pain down there that I feel like I am getting a hundred pap smears a day – from the inside out…. It was very disappointing. And yet, realistically I know that even if I had been dilated it still wouldn’t mean diddly squat since women walk around all the time dilated for weeks. But it still would have been nice. Especially since the Drs have my due date as March 26th even though I believe it is March 28th so they have a cut off that is closer than mine for when they want to talk c section and granted it is only 2 days difference but right now 2 days could mean all the difference. The Dr I saw yesterday said that their practice does not strip membranes. She didn’t say why but I thought that was interesting. The good news is that my exam showed I have started to efface (the ultrasound tech last week measured my cervix just for the heck of it and it was around 2cm long – I don’t know how that translates in terms of effacement but it’s interesting to note anyways) and the cervix is very soft but still pretty high although anterior so that’s good. I am trying to remind myself that things can change quickly and dilation isn’t everything but at this point it is pretty super important if we are going to vbac so… get on it cervix!

 

I started drinking raspberry leaf tea since it is said to help tone the uterus and shorten labor. After I drank it last night I went to bed and had only maybe 3 contractions and have had hardly any today compared to normal. (The tea does not stimulate contractions, it only tones the uterus.) The upside to not having contractions all night was that I didn’t wake up in pain over and over for no reason. 🙂 I also have been rethinking breast pumping starting at 37 weeks. I know my Dr said it is fine after 37 weeks but I have read that it can cause dangerously strong contractions. However, from what I read on Dr Google, this is more likely to happen if you are pumping for HOURS. (Can you imagine? Who would pump for hours?) My Dr didn’t set a time frame but I am pretty sure the unspoken understanding was that this was meant to be a 15 minute thing once or twice a day. So maybe if I do end up going ahead with it, I will wait until right before I go for an NST so that if anything wonky does happen, I will be there at the hospital.

 

No need to read. My silly thoughts at end of pregnancy.

I think people are starting to think that I am just being impatient about this last month of pregnancy.  As excited as I am to meet little Levi, I can wait 3 more weeks if that’s what he needs. But my main motivation to get labor going in the next 1-2 weeks is I am worried that I will end up with another c section even if it is unneeded. I have no problem getting sectioned again if it’s what Levi and I need, but I just feel like we should be able to do this! And I feel like I’m losing my confidence in that. Also, I have literally nowhere else to inject my Heparin that isn’t a bruise already and it is getting very painful. My belly looks and feels like it has been kicked by a steel toed boot. My hips are also bruised and I have a particularly awful bruise on my leg. I am also allergic to something in the Heparin and I have itchy spots everywhere I inject. My injection sites have also been bleeding for sometimes over 8 hours after I take my shot. It is not pretty. I miss Lovenox. Lovenox hurts more during the injection itself for me but the after effects are very minimal. Also, driving over 3 hours round trip twice a week to get monitored for 20 minutes and sent home even when  Levi doesn’t quite pass (he has had several times that he just didn’t accelerate enough but the Dr still sent us home with no extra monitoring leaving me wondering why I even went) is wearing me out. As far as physically being in pain and tired, that I can handle. I will miss being pregnant as far as the kicks and that sweet time where baby is always with me wherever I go… I really will miss that part. I am so conflicted!

Ok, you can read again. 

How far along? 36 weeks 4 days

How big is the baby? Probably close to 7 pounds if he was really 6lbs 8oz last week as the ultrasound estimated. The Dr said she isn’t concerned about the difference between his head and belly percentiles at this point because A) he is almost ready to be born and B) she thinks he has done well following his growth curve and C) his head is engaged so it really may be bigger than it measured.

Total weight gain/loss? I’ve had bad water retention issues again this week. I went up 9 pounds in less that 48 hours and lost most of it quickly but I have had a hard time with that now and then when I walk a lot. A trip to the mall sent me over the edge this time. But yesterday at my appointment I had gained just 2 pounds in 2 weeks so I guess I am probably up 31-ish pounds. Maybe more.

Sleep? As I mentioned before, contractions waking me up have been a bit of an issue until last night. But honestly, I feel like I am sleeping really well for this point of pregnancy.

Best moment this week? I had a really nice tech do my growth ultrasound. She kept trying to get a shot of Levi’s face which we haven’t been able to see for almost a month now as he has been mostly facing my back. But she really took her time and I about fell off the table when she said “I wish he would turn so I could do some 3D.” Then a minute later she asked if I would mind if she did 3D. I haven’t had any done this pregnancy so of course I was really excited that she wanted to try. We saw his little face and it is so cute and squishy! Unfortunately, Tru started screaming right then because he had sat through my NST and the growth ultrasound and waited in the waiting room and he was just done. So the tech said she would quit playing around and let us go. Talk about disappointing! Just when it was getting good! 😉 But she did print me one 3D picture in which Levi looks super grumpy. It’s precious. 🙂

Symptoms? I saw my Chiropractor this week and he said my pelvis was out pretty bad on the right (which I knew already from the pain). He got it back to normal and said to come see him every week until Levi is born so we can hopefully keep the pelvis aligned for an easier birth. He also offered to try inducing my labor with acupuncture after 38 weeks. I probably will take him up on that. The OB said it couldn’t hurt but she doubted it would work. But hey, if it can’t hurt, why not? So my inner thigh pain is slightly better. Since baby has dropped, a lot of my symptoms have lessened. I actually feel pretty good. Heavy and slow but good.

Food cravings? Still on my greens and salads and I really want candy/sweets.

Food aversions? As if! 😉

Gender? Baby boy, Levi. 🙂

Labor signs? Apparently not although my body has switched to clean out mode if you know what I mean. Gross.

What I’m looking forward to? Baby sprinkle if we are able to have it, weather permitting.

Milestones? Less than a week until I am the most pregnant I have ever been.

Bump? We had some maternity pictures done last weekend. I haven’t seen them yet but I am excited to see how they turned out.

 

 

RSCN2858

I feel like I look really weird. I’m not sure what is going on with my face. It’s just that end of pregnancy look I guess.

 

Dear God, I ask Your blessings and protection over the last bit of this pregnancy and birth. Thank You for how far You have brought us to this point. Thank You for this sweet baby and for his sweet kicks and movements and for this last bit of time that I get to have with him just me and him. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

 

 

 

 

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