I was beginning to think Levi would not be a self-weaning baby, and I was not so secretly FINE with that. I am in no hurry to wean him yet and he was adamant in his desire to nurse alllll day and had gotten even more attached to the boob in the last month since he learned to ask for it by patting my chest, tugging my shirt and occasionally making a “buh” sound. We are talking, I would be walking through the store pushing the cart and he’s in the seat patting my boob area and crying. (Less weird than it sounds).

Well, suddenly he is not interested. He stopped asking me frequently to nurse and started shaking his head “no” and even making his sound for “no” when I would ask if he wanted to nurse. Usually, I can ask him from another room if he wants a boob and he comes crawling as fast as he can.

This boob rejection started 4 days ago and it’s getting worse. Today I have almost no milk and am hardly feeling let-downs. On the occasions he does ask to nurse, he pops off before any milk even has a chance to come down.

Part of this is probably because he is obsessed with practicing walking! He can walk but chooses to crawl most of the time. He walked from the TV to the couch today which is across the room. He is getting really good at it but he lacks confidence just yet to give up crawling entirely. But he practices all day! Maybe he is letting go of nursing as a way to assert his new-found independence. Or maybe he’s just tired of it. And outgrowing it.

Honestly, I thought he may well be coming up on age 2 and me having to wean him. Instead, he’s doing it on his own. It’s a good thing, but also really hard for me. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to nurse a baby again and our breastfeeding relationship has been so great. I’ll miss that bonding time terribly!! I savor that time to snuggle Levi and I absolutely love that my body feeds him. I didn’t know if breastfeeding would work for me (us) and I’m so thankful that it did and so sad to see it end. It was hard when Tru weaned but I was pregnant again already so that just made sense. This though, this just feels hard. I know some people might not understand but it’s just the way I feel and that’s that.

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