I don’t know what sort of strange urge drove me to buy a fertility test kit. I mean, seriously!? What sort of silliness is that? But I saw the E.P.T fertility test kit marked down significantly awhile back as it was getting ready to expire in a few months and on a whim, I bought it. I reasoned that I could sell the Female Test (which I did) and keep the Male Test. But then I tucked the test away, calmed down on my obsessive TTC efforts and never asked DH to take it.

You see, we know that the last results we have of DH’s sperm count were… terrible to say the least. 1million per ml, fair motility, and 0%morphology. That’s darn near sterile! And his count was on the steady decline. Over the course of 1.5 years it went from 10mil to 8mil to 3mil to 1mil. And the morph had went from 4% to 0%. And it was with those terrible results followed by so much prayer that we had decided to pursue IVF/ICSI. Yet, Levi happened.

SO….. I have always wondered, was Levi literally the one in a million that God picked for us? The one that made it through. The one lonely sperm who actually was good at swimming, and was morphologically normal? He is quite obviously a miracle and the one that God chose to give us. But was DH also healed? By some divine miracle has he been healed?

The answer to that question could be found in that test. At least, the test tells whether the sperm count is above or below 20mil/ml. It tells nothing of motility or morphology. Obviously, it’s not a fool-proof test. It could give wrong results and we could stay none-the-wiser. But that was quite awhile back that I bought the test and now I don’t know if I want to know the result. To find out that DH doesn’t have a normal sperm count would be a bit depressing as we do want to get pregnant “naturally” again. But we also have to remember if his test comes back abnormal that we still got pregnant before against all odds. Praise God! It could happen again if it’s in God’s will for us to grow our family that way. Or maybe God will lead us another direction with growing our family. Through treatment again, or maybe not.

To be honest, DH isn’t that thrilled about the idea of testing and I understand because I have my own doubts about whether he should. And I can always sell the test if he doesn’t use it. To test or not to test…. that is the question!

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