Archives for the month of: October, 2014

I always tell people that I’m not good at technology. They seldom believe me until they’ve seen my bumbling in action. I’m young so I must know how to use all the new gadgets, right? Well, I’ve had my phone going on 3 years now. Yesterday I discovered that it can take screen shots. It took me almost 3 years to figure this out! This would have made my life so much easier. I’m no good at technology. Believe me now?

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…We brought our little Truett home from the hospital. He was under 6 pounds at that point from the normal drop in weight after birth and he was too small even for his newborn clothes, but he pooped and/or peed on all the small outfits we had brought to take him home in so he was swimming in a gigantic 3 month outfit. The pants alone could cover his whole body.

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Looking so tiny in his newborn outfit I had bought and prayed over during my second IVF.

We had to stop at Wal-mart on the way home because we didn’t have any baby nail clippers. My mammoth boobs had outgrown all my bras once my milk came in. I bought a D cup and I couldn’t fit it. It was awhile before I found a bra that fit… but that’s another story. I made DH push me in the wheelchair because I didn’t feel up to using the power wheelchair yet. He insisted that we looked like bad young parents and should leave Tru in his car-seat and have DH push him in the cart while I drove around in the power wheelchair. I just couldn’t handle the tugging on my belly so I held Tru while DH pushed us. We got a lot of bad looks and several comments about how tiny our baby was and how we needed to be careful. It annoyed me. If these people only knew what we had went through to get this tiny little baby they would know just how careful we were being.

DH drove so carefully. It was so sweet. I was aching to get home on the long ride though. I was having to hand pump while we drove because my milk was in full force and I was about to bust. Once we pulled in the driveway and DH carried everything inside, I surveyed our very messy living room. It was now full of baby stuff and for the first time in his life, my clean freak husband did not freak out about it. Our living room hasn’t been clean since and I love it. 🙂

Daddy adores his little boy. I love seeing the bond they have with each other.

Daddy adores his little boy. I love seeing the bond they have with each other.

I can hardly believe it has been a year. The time feels so short. I look at Tru and am in absolute amazement at all he has learned in the first year of his life. He says words, he eats what we eat, he whistles, he has been taking steps all by himself, he plays with the dog, he laughs at us, he loves to hug us. This little, helpless, 6lb 6oz newborn has grown in one short year to a tall, strong, toddler

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Riding in a borrowed car seat. 😉

Modeling his camo and daddy's deer hide.

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Tru fell asleep on the walk.

You can't get cuter than that.

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Walking to Horseshoe Falls.

At lunch with my Grandma. Tru drank a lot of my water and then decided he needed a smoke.

Tru was so inthralled by the geese that were everywhere around us (one actually ate from my hand) and the fish that were jumping up in the water to grab food.

This face. This is what convinces me to open my eyes in the morning when I wake up all kinds of tired. :)

Addicted to teething wafers now. They do keep him happy...

Down by the River.

Tru's favorite person in the world now. Who cares about mom when you can be best buds with dad?

Daddy's surprise. ;)

My niece was not impressed by her new car but Tru sure was! We put the seat belt on him but he wouldn't sit down! Thankfully they weren't actually driving.

Love that face!!

He sat in his toy box. (Please ignore all the front porch building crap out the window.)

He tackled Mommy.

He walked behind Daddy. He's braver than I am. ;)

He sat in his bumbo... and wore it like a turtle.

And most of all, he looked adorable.

I think he was eyeballing my Fair hamburger.

Somehow DH actually held Tru in that cut out while standing there. Talent, I'm tellin' ya.

But he wouldn't give them to me.

He really loves walking around with Daddy. ;)

I love you Truett Matthew. You make every day so very special. I am so happy to be your mommy. You have filled my heart with so much love. When I look at you and you smile back at me, I can see that you love me and that you trust me. When you give me your precious little baby hugs and lay your head on my shoulder and pat my back with your sweet baby hands, I know a love that is unique between a mother and her baby. It melts my heart and brings tears to my eyes thinking of how much you mean to me.

Dear God, thank You so much for this beautiful year of love and joy. Thank You for all that Truett has learned and for all the new things he does every day. I pray that You will always protect him in all the things he does and the places he goes. Please continue to bestow Your blessings on his life. I pray that You will show us how to raise him properly and teach him all about You and Your Son Jesus. I will never forget the journey that brought us to Truett and the grace and love that You showed on us by allowing us to be the parents of this beautiful little creation of Yours. I pray that You will lead him and guide him all throughout his life and show him Your ways and the things that You have for him to do with his life. I thank You and I praise You for working such a miracle for us. Please protect Truett every day of his life. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Know-it-all doctors (and people in general) who don’t give a crap about what anyone has to say. You can’t tell them anything because they know.it.all!

I had the stupidest doctor visit of possibly my entire life today. As loyal readers may remember, 2 days ago I visited triage and was diagnosed with placenta previa. A quick recap…The resident Dr didn’t know if it was complete or not. It looked complete. The MFM who delivered Tru came in and checked the placenta and my cervix and said that she thought the placenta looked like it might be marginal because she thought she saw the edge of the cervix without placenta on it. She said there was a chance it might move up before full term, but no promises. She also said that the ultrasound machine was a dinosaur and seemed to be missing pixels. Bad image. The resident thought I should be rescanned on Mon. The MFM said to definitely come in Mon for a check up as I already had an appointment and they could check things over better then. Why the heck would she tell me to come back if all I was going to do today is pee dip, blood pressure and doppler?

Here’s what REALLY makes me mad. Like very very mad. The dr I saw today asked why I went to triage and I told her about the discharge/mucus/blood stuff and that the resident and MFM said I had previa. She looked at her “notes” which were in my opinion either from my first ultrasound 4 weeks ago, or maybe she just pulled them out of her butt, and said that no, the placenta is low lying which means that it is at least 2cm away from the cervical os.

Ok then, I guess the MFM and resident are idiots then and have no idea what cervixes or placentas look like because they must be pretty stupid to think that the placenta is entirely or almost entirely covering the os. I saw the ultrasound too. I saw the cervix with a big fluffy pillow laying on top of it. The resident and MFM are not stupid. I’m no dr but I will vouch for that.

She wouldn’t check the ultrasound pictures or order a new ultrasound. (Because know-it-alls can’t because they might be proven wrong. Gasp!) She pretty much just insinuated that I had made up a diagnosis and was fishing for an ultrasound. Bahahahahaha lady!! 30+ ultrasounds in my life, I’m totally over them. Not that I don’t love seeing my little baby on the ultrasound but it’s not the breathtaking experience that it was the first 10 times. I had so many ultrasounds with Truett. I had 3 in a week at one point. I lost count after 15 and that was ages before I delivered. I’m over it. Turn the screen if you are that worried about it. Heck, don’t even look at the baby, just check my dang placenta!!

Now, realistically I understand that nothing can be done for previa as the placenta either migrates up with the growing uterus or it doesn’t. But since the drs on Sat made it sound like it should be and would be checked again on Mon, I felt like the dr today was being very lax. I already had my pee dipped, BP taken and baby dopplered Sat. So thanks for a pointless waste of my time and gas and thanks so very much for trying to make me feel stupid. I don’t feel stupid. We had been hoping for a little clarification and reassurance today so we would know what to be prepared for before finding out the hard way.

I asked her what to do if I have serious bleeding. I am 30 minutes from the nearest hospital with a maternity unit and if hemorrhaging is a risk for someone not on blood thinners, it is more so for me. She said “call us and we can talk about it and tell you what to do if you need to come in.” So, call you, leave message, wait 30 minutes for a call back, and die waiting? HMMMMM, no I think not.

I asked about the painful contractions and cramps that I have been having for the last few days. They wrap around my sides and I feel pressure in my butt and they are quite uncomfortable. That’s not normal in my previous experience. She said that maybe it’s normal for this pregnancy. Yeah, and MAYBE it’s not lady! Check it out why don’t you or tell me what to do if it gets worse or how to stop it. She said to try sitting down… IT’S WHEN I’M SITTING DOWN!! sigh.

And one last thing…. I am sick to space and back with all the drs telling me that I shouldn’t have sex whenever I have a concern. I say I’m cramping. Dr:”Sex can be very irritating to the cervix.” Me:I HAVEN’T HAD SEX IN ALMOST 3 MONTHS! Dr:”Oh, ok. (unbelieving look) Well don’t.” Me:Believe me, I won’t. I’m in pain plus I’m scared. I’m having spotting. Dr:”Did you have sex? Sex can be very irritating to the cervix.” Me:I know. This ain’t my first rodeo. I know about.the.sex!

I don’t know if I should call the nurse tomorrow and tell her that absolutely nothing was addressed that the drs Sat had talked about or if I should just let it go. I already know what they told me to do. Couch rest. No lifting. Pelvic rest. Expect bleeding and call immediately. I should probably just go with that. Like I said, they can’t fix previa. It fixes itself or it doesn’t. I’m just finding it very scary.

The placenta is either partially or completely covering the cervix. The ultrasound machine is a dinosaur so it was hard to tell. There is a chance that the placenta could move up with the uterus as it grows (the placenta doesn’t really move but the uterus takes it up with it while it expands) but it’s not promising. If it stays covering the cervix until full term, it’s automatic c section which we already half way expected anyway.

The Resident did an abdominal ultrasound and then trans vaginal and couldn’t get a good view of the cervix, so the MFM came in and tried her hand at it and wasn’t able to get a much better view. But she thinks my cervix is measuring about 3.1cm. Hopefully I won’t have any more spotting/bleeding/mucus stuff but it’s likely that I will. I’m supposed to go back in 2 days for my regular check up and I’m not sure if they are going to check everything again on a better machine or what. I also got to get a straight catheter. Fun times people. But it didn’t make my bladder spasm so, I’m happy. 🙂

The baby looked cute, albeit pretty hard to see on that old fuzzy machine. The MFM said it looked like some pixels were missing from the machine so the image is pretty bad. But it was squirming around going from breach to kind of sideways. It still looks so tiny! The fluid was 3. Anything over 2 is ok at this point according to them, but at 16 weeks with Tru it was 4 and we see how that turned out… so it worried me a little. But the immediate concern is hoping this previa doesn’t cause problems.

They sent me home on couch rest. No lifting. That could get interesting with a one year old… Pelvic rest, cause you know, we haven’t had sex in 11 weeks anyways!

That’s about it. Please pray for this baby to stay in there and for us not to have any problems. Previa or otherwise.

I woke up in the night with blood tinged mucus. Yes, I know it’s gross. You’re reading a pregnancy blog. Get over it. I had a lot of cramping through the night and this morning so I decided to head to the dr and get it checked out. I’m not there yet. And no, we didn’t have sex. This is just my body being stupid. 😦 A year ago today I was in the hospital having my baby boy. Today I have to go to the same hospital because my body is stupid. Poor Tru. I’m sure this is really his idea of a fun day. 😦 Please just pray all is fine and that the baby will stay safe in there.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how different our financial situation is from so many other of our friends and family. We certainly aren’t living high on the hog right now but we are still so very blessed.

Sometimes I look at friends and family around me and I feel bad that we can’t afford so many of the things they have, of course many of them are older than we are so it makes sense that they have had more time to build up their assets. It dawned on me the other day though that I really shouldn’t feel bad at all!! How many of my friends and family members by the age of 24 (DH) and 25 (Me) had paid for 2 out of pocket surgeries, 2 out of pocket IUIs, 1 surgery partially covered by insurance but still with a hefty co pay, and 2 IVFs with insurance yes, but still quite pricey, etc? I can tell you how many. ZERO!!  Not to mention that during that time period we also bought a house, a (used) truck and a (used) car. And all that on basically one income. I made money for awhile cleaning houses but it can’t really be counted towards much seeing as I had to buy new carpet when we bought our house and saved some money for IVF so my earnings weren’t going toward our regular expenses. Right now, I care for an elderly lady one day a week if I’m lucky and that probably won’t last much longer as I foresee her needing more around the clock care soon.

Maybe instead of being down on us for not being able to afford to go the places our friends go, or keep up with the latest fashions, or buy Tru all the coolest baby gear; I should be thankful for all that God has allowed us to accomplish in these 6 years of marriage we have had. I should be thankful for the man I married who is willing to make so many sacrifices so that we could afford to do all we have done. Let’s face it, without sacrifice and God’s grace we would have not been able to go through the fertility treatments that we went through. I am thankful for a sweet and loving husband who works so hard for us every day, working overtime lots of the time so that I can be a stay at home mommy because that is what is important to us while Tru is little. I am thankful for my parents who raised me to be wise with our money and even though that is often looked on as being cheap, tight, stingy by those around us, it helps us to get by. I am so thankful and so utterly blessed. Our sacrifices have been rewarded in the little boy currently snuggled up safe and warm in his bed. We may still be paying off our IVF bill for our first IVF, but that doesn’t matter. I have my sweet little baby that we waited so long for and worked so hard for, turning ONE tomorrow! I have our little conception miracle baby snuggled up in my belly, growing. I have my faith in God and my promise of riches untold in heaven.

Yes, we may be “low income”, “middle class”, “paycheck to paycheck”… but we are so very rich.

My last weekly post for Truett. It’s bitter sweet. I will miss his little weekly updates but I’m happy that he is *almost* a ONE year old. Wow. One year already. That’s crazy. He’s my little baby! But no, he looks like a toddler, he acts like a toddler – he must be a toddler!

Sorry for no pictures this time. We are almost out of data so I’m limited to text only. 😦

His birthday is this Saturday but his party isn’t planned for another 2 weeks. I feel like I have time still to plan but I really better get a fire under my butt. Invites have been sent, party favor treat bags have been made, (a few have been eaten), some decorations are collecting dust already…. I’m excited. 🙂

Potty training goes great when mommy sticks to it, but it turns out that taking someone to the bathroom every.half.hour is quite a challenge. I think maybe once an hour would be better for both of us. I don’t want to wear him out on it since he likes using the potty. He goes basically every time we put him on. But he really does pee every half hour so if I take him once an hour, he will go in his diaper in between times. That’s ok though. At this point when he goes in his diaper he isn’t having an “accident”. We don’t say anything about him peeing in his diaper, we just praise his peeing on the toilet. I feel like if we keep it fun and familiar, we will get this thing accomplished sooner and in a less stressful way. 18 months is kind of my “goal” although I say that loosely because you really can’t predict when it will click with him that he can do ALL his pees in the toilet.

A few things worth noting this week:

  • When you hand Tru something, he says “Ca”. I don’t know if this is “thank you” or not but it is very consistent.
  • If you offer him a bottle and he wants it, he cries. I have no idea why. He doesn’t seem to think that he can respond to milk without a desperate little whimper. Kind of like when you get ready to nurse and the baby whimpers in excitement.
  • He is officially on cows milk. We ran out of formula a  few days ago so I figured it was close enough and gave him cows milk. He LOVED it!! With formula, he was taking 4oz bottles at a time but with the cow milk he wants at least 6oz. I’m fine with that because he looks a little slimmer to me lately so I am happy for him to get the extra calories.
  • He loves hearing the baby on the doppler. No matter what he is doing, as soon as he hears the doppler come on, he crawls to me as fast as he can and laughs and smiles. I have no idea what that is about. It’s almost like he knows…
  • His favorite games are: pushing us over from a sitting position to laying on the floor, riding daddy like a horse, getting tickled, getting into things he cannot have, stealing phones and remotes, taking everything out of mommy’s purse or the diaper bag, throwing his blankets out of his playpen preferably before he goes to sleep so that I can wake him up covering him back up, anything with music.
  • He absolutely adores showers/baths.
  • He can whistle. I know, it’s crazy right? But he does!!! It’s not like he’s whistling a tune but one flat note and he does it all day now that he discovered it.
  • We still haven’t found a food that he won’t eat. He eats everything. Pickles? Yep. Tomatoes? Yep. Bugs? *sigh* Yep. I am on constant bug watch. If he finds a fly, he will catch it and he will eat it. He has caught at least one fly recently. He’s like a karate master or something.
  • He needs his first hair cut. I have been informed that the long stands growing places are NOT adorable. I strongly disagree but whatever. I guess we have to hack his precious little baby hairs. *sniff, sniff* Mommy is feeling very strong emotions about this. Once that baby fuzz is gone, he really isn’t a baby anymore.
  • He has taken his first step!!!! From Daddy to Mommy and with no coaxing either! We were both laying on the floor and Tru was using us as his human jungle gyms and he took a step from Daddy Gym to Mommy Gym. I was impressed to say the least!
  • He has also stood on his own a few times. The first time he realized he was standing all by himself, he got really excited and started waving his arms which of course made him lose his balance. It was funny. I’ve never seen a baby fall so gently before as he does. If he knows he is falling down, it’s like he goes in slow motion and falls really carefully. I guess that after bumping his head a few times he decided enough was enough. 🙂
  • He talks on absolutely every phone shaped object he gets his hands on. He jabbers for a few seconds and then he laughs. I wonder if he is mimicking me? I mean, he must be because he sees me talk on the phone. He loves talking on the phone for real too to Daddy or Grandma etc. He just smiles and listens and every once in awhile he will “say” something. I love it.

I guess that’s enough for now. I feel like there is so much more and I don’t want to forget anything. I have printed some of this blog for Tru to have someday in case anything should ever happen to this blog address. I want to print him all of his updates. I would love to be able to read what I was doing at his age. 🙂 I just love this little guy so much. I tell him all the time that I love him and he almost always smiles up at me. He melts my heart! Every little thing about him. His little babbling and laughing is like music to my ears. ( The crying, not so much. 😉 )

Dear God, thank You for this beautiful year and for all the many things Tru has learned and for all the adventures we’ve had and the things we’ve done. He is such a beautiful and sweet baby and I love him so much. Thank You for blessing us with the privilege of being his parents . In Jesus’ name, amen.

Link to pregnancy post with Truett. 

I forgot to take a picture for week 14 yet but I think it is safe to say that if my belly wasn’t huge before, it is now! I can’t believe how much faster it pops out the second time around.

Braxton Hicks contractions started at the end of week 13. Yes, I start them nice and early. I had an “irritable” uterus last time and it seems we may be headed that way this time as well. Things that caused contractions last time: having to pee, being thirsty, pressure on my belly such as my hand or my waist band or having NSTs done (non stress tests), sitting in one position too long (like 1.5 seconds), laying on my back, nothing at all…. So yes, but on the bright side, I should have a SUPER toned uterus. If only I could teach my butt cheeks to work out voluntarily!

Another good thing about BH is that I can feel exactly where my uterus is. I had no idea that it was all the way up to an inch below my belly button! I forgot how high it was at this stage. Pretty cool. 🙂

How far along? 14 weeks 4 days 

How big is the baby? 3.5 inches plus legs. I looked at a measuring tape and held it up to my belly. That is so much bigger than I thought! 

Total weight gain/loss? I think I am at +/- 0 although I may be up a pound or 2 by now because it has been a few days since I weighed myself. 

Maternity clothes? I have almost no cold weather maternity clothes! I wore capris and dresses with Tru because my fattest part of pregnancy was summer! I am hoping to go shopping soon. 

Sleep? It’s iffy but mostly because I’m hot, no I’m cold, I have to pee, no I don’t, DH is tossing and turning, Tru’s up! 

Best moment this week? Feeling more flutters and a couple little pushes on my belly. very tiny pushes. 

Symptoms? Cramping, round ligament pain, extremely restless legs!! Like my legs are about to walk off on their own. I am not able to keep them still for anything. I have restless legs during my cycles too… Sore boobies! They were 0% sore during the first Tri but I hit the second and WOW! Plus they grew from A’s to C’s overnight. Seriously. I woke up and they were sore and felt engorged.

Food cravings? Nothing specific but I want to eat! A lot!

Food aversions? Nothing!! Isn’t that crazy?!

Gender? DH is 100% sure it’s a girl. Just like he was with Truett. 😉 We have a girl name all picked out and ready to go for ummm, let’s see, over 6 years now (???). Journey Faith. As far as boy names go we have been stumped. Bruce has been a possibility. At first I just couldn’t see naming a newborn, Bruce. But it has grown on me and I think it’s kind of cute. What kind of middle name do you put with Bruce though? Lee is out (ya know, Bruce Lee) even though it would honor my FIL as well as me since it is part of my name (my favorite part of my name). Also, Bruce Wayne. Really, my only problem with the name Bruce is that even though it’s not a common name, it isn’t a rare name like Truett. How many Truett’s do you suppose we will meet in our lifetime? Not many. And I don’t favor weird names but rather rare first names. SO, I stumbled upon the name Shay and I LOVE IT!!! When I say the name Shay, I get the same sweet feeling I get when I say the name Truett. I know, that probably makes no sense. But I find it adorable and the meaning is perfect! Gift, God’s grace. Best of all, it’s pretty rare. Still stumped on a middle name though and Bruce Shay has now become an option but we shall see. I may be looking in vain anyways. There is a 50% chance this baby is a GIRL after all. 🙂

Belly button in or out? The belly button is weird ok! The top is out and overall it’s just getting kind of flat. It’s certainly not in but it’s also not making my shirts poke out yet.

What I’m looking forward to? Kicks getting stronger. They have been very faint and mostly just a flutter here and there. Very sporadic. I may not really feel anything all day. It’s weird because I know I’m still early for movement anyways but I was definitely feeling Tru by now and I always read that you feel your second baby sooner. Of course I could have an anterior placenta this time.

Bump? Sorry, no pic.

Dear God, I am so thankful for the little baby flutters I have been feeling and so happy that I am feeling better now from the morning sickness. I pray that my appointment will go well and that all will be well with the baby. In Jesus’ name, amen.

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