Everything was chugging along. I was having several days of great morning sickness and starting to feel an iota of confidence. I was happily counting down the days until my ultrasound appointment (five) and feeling like I was actually doing really well with pregnancy the second time around. Not feeling too negative or anxious. Not wishing the days away. Just enjoying every day as I truly have learned that there is no “safe” point in pregnancy. On the day Tru was born, he was in distress. There really is no 100% safe time in pregnancy – or in life in general really. 

 

Anyways, all that confidence and good feelings left yesterday and I am feeling powerless to get back to that good place. Yesterday I did not feel pregnant. At all really. My morning sickness was gone! Gone was all the gagging and churning and having to sit down to get through a tough spot of nausea. I absolutely cannot stand how pregnancy symptoms come and go. I know that they come and go. I know that it is ok. But when they go, you don’t know when or if they are coming back. And if you have morning sickness and then it goes away and doesn’t come back….. It can be a very not good thing. 

 

This is the hardest point in pregnancy though. The point where you can’t use a doppler, haven’t had ultrasound proof of a baby, can’t go to triage and get an NST if you are worried, can’t do kick counts. The health of the baby is totally out of my control right now. I have to trust God to take care of everything in there. God, please watch over this little baby and sustain it’s life according to Your will. In Jesus’ name, amen. I have to trust that everything is alright even though I don’t always feel that way.

 

I would take some prayers for morning sickness though… 😉 

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