Every time I see a mommy at her wit’s end with her little one and she gives me that flustered, exhausted look and says something like “Kids!! 1 is definitely enough for me!” or “Kids change everything. You’ll never sleep in again!” I continually find myself thinking – Maybe we are the lucky ones.

We had the chance to sleep in and we found out, we don’t care for it that much! We went from envisioning our ideal family of 5 (or however many) to thinking “I hope we can have at least one!”
We had time for lots of romantic evenings with our spouse but we found out that it wasn’t that easy to enjoy all that alone time when we had nothing BUT alone time together. And romantic? Who am I kidding?! There’s nothing that romantic about timed BD’ing. That will kill the mood real quick.
Suddenly “peace and quiet” wasn’t all that peaceful anymore. The quiet was too quiet and our minds were never at peace because our thoughts were so distraught with trying to remember if we needed to OPK again at 3:00 or 3:45, and is a 7mm lining really good enough? Should we be taking more CoQ10 or was that actually hurting our chances? Would DH have more studly swimmers if he would start taking 2 zinc a day instead of 1?
All that free time wasn’t very free because we filled up the hours googling early pregnancy symptoms like it was our job or breaking the bank buying up all the FRERs and a years supply of OPKs.
Girl’s night out became our worst nightmare because all we could think about was how we might be missing ovulation by an hour.
Those wonderful child-free vacations weren’t happening either because, let’s face it, who has money for vacations when you’re doing IVF or any ART for that matter?
But for real girls… at least we had the time to do our nails and even put on some make up every day. Of course, we cried all our mascara off before the day was half over and another 20 times after that. And we couldn’t paint our nails because, well you know… we googled it once and there was like one person who swore that their IVF failed because they accidentally inhaled too much nail polish while painting their toenails.

So, when I hear all the warnings comments now from well-meaning parents about how things will never be the same again and I will never have time to so much as eat breakfast, I think (well, first of all I think “good!! because I never want to go back to IF. I never want those things to be the same again!”) – maybe we are the lucky ones. We are so blessed to be able to appreciate our babies in a way that far exceeds the understanding of many. (I want to be very clear here in stating that I do know many fertile people who appreciate their children beyond belief and are exceptionally good parents and I do know that they couldn’t love their children one drop more without their hearts just exploding from the love.) We worked so hard and waited so long, we have no regrets about having children now. No fantasizing about an extra year alone with our spouse before children. We 100% love and adore our babies. So yes, it may not seem like it looking back on all the horrible things we endured to get our babies, but maybe, just maybe we are the lucky ones.

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