Archives for the month of: April, 2013

     Wow! I can’t believe tomorrow is 15 weeks! Such an exciting time. We are REALLY looking forward to our 20 week anatomy scan and possibly gender reveal. Our plan is to have them write the gender down in an envelope and then we can take it to my friend who is an awesome cake decorator and she could make us a cake with the baby’s name on it and cupcakes to take to our families. I haven’t run this idea by her yet but we might ask her if we feel we can wait the extra time it takes to make the cake. 😉
     Sometime around 22 weeks we are supposed to have a heart echo done on the baby Lord willing. The dr said she isn’t expecting any problems but appearently they like to check all ICSI babies. That way we know if the baby may have a heart issue that needs treatment at birth. Also, they are wanting to check by ultrasound for defects of the spine. The dr said the defects can often be treated by surgery in the womb. We declined all other testing though. There is not a snowball’s chance in a dryer in July that we would even remotely consider the unspeakable if something is wrong with our baby such as downs ect. I realize that some people do this testing so they can be prepared but too often the tests give false positives and I don’t see how that could help us at all. Then doing amnio or CVS to verify is too huge a risk. We love this baby and nothing can change that.
       I think I’m finally feeling the occasional very very light flutter. Sometimes I wonder if its really the baby but its unlike anything else I feel in there. I’m looking forward to feeling strong kicks and rolls. The baby’s feet are up by the placenta right now though so its cushioned. I still love to listen on my doppler but I’ve been cutting back on it because I think it can be aggravating to baby. Or maybe this is just an active child hence all the swimming around.
      I did things a bit backward of what the pregnancy books say. The bbs weren’t too sore in the 1st trimester but now? Its a whole different story. Morning sickness left around 11 or 12 weeks but made a mild reappearance around 13 weeks. I have still only gained 2 or 3 pounds despite my best efforts. I eat very healthy right now because anything less makes the tummy protest. Its hard to gain much on veggies. I’m drinking lots of milk now and eating lots of potatoes (they sound awesome for some reason). Salad is my favorite food right now as well as asparagus, chilli, celery and rice. As long as baby is growing, I’m happy. The bump has grown a bit according to DH. Actually, he said it was huge but that’s an exaggeration. I notice my underwear don’t fit as well and even my pjs are getting tight. It feels better to sleep with a pillow under the bump. But, visually…. its not a really shocking bump yet. Its just cute. I love it. Inside this bruised up, ridiculously hairy tummy, our baby is growing. That fact alone makes this not so pretty tummy –  beautiful.
      God, I’m so thankful for this baby and for the blessing of carrying it. Please protect us and keep us healthy, strong and safe throughout this pregnancy. In Jesus’ name, amen.

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     So… yesterday I made a long drive to the OB for a quick visit. I was having BAD low back pain and pretty nasty cramps for a few days so I finally called the nurse just to get her opinion. I was pretty sure it was ok but thought I should run it by her. I also mentioned the weird “tampon falling out” feeling I was having down south. That bothered her quite a bit so she asked the dr who said to come in just in case. Turns out I’m allergic to Monistat. I had alot of swelling. ‘Nuff said. I was on my 6th day and every day the swelling and weird feeling were getting worse. They are fairly certain that’s what caused it. That and of course, the extra pregnancy blood flow causing a “fuller” sensation. But the yeast infection is gone now anyways and she said no more Monistat. From now on they will prescribe me something instead. 🙂 The dr asked me if I wash my clothes in Tide. I don’t. But she said that can be extremely irritating to some women “down there”. She used an interesting analogy. Its like putting your underwear in your mouth because that skin doesn’t have the protection our other skin has. I’m going to have to break that habit now. Which is a real shame because I so enjoy chewing on my underwear. Not the ones I’m wearing of course! Ok, just kidding…. but really. I almost jumped out of my underwear the other day. (Not the ones I was chewing on though.) DH gave me my shot and I started bleeding from the injection site like a fountain. He could barely contain it for a few seconds. Well later on I went into the bathroom and there in the toilet was tons of blood. My heart dropped for a second as I yelled for DH. Why did he throw the blood soaked tissue in the toilet and not flush it? Seriously!!!
      The OB I saw yesterday was another of the clinics drs. I forget how many they have. She was so nice. When she listened for the baby on the doppler I told her that’s my favorite sound in the world right now. She agreed wholeheartedly that it is! The nurse there is so sweet too. She told me as soon as I got there that she was thinking while I was driving there that if she could pick between 3 things the weird sensation I was having could be, she really hoped it was the Monistat. I thought it was really sweet of her to be thinking of me.
       I planted little marigold and zinnia seeds in the pots on my porch recently. They’ve already come up. It makes me think of this little baby sprouting up so fast in there. I can tell its really growing a lot now. My tummy is about the same but my uterus is much bigger and firm. Its quite a bit higher. Growing a baby takes a lot out of me! I have more of the pregnancy exhaustion now than in the beginning. That’s ok though. I’m happy to relax and put my feet up just thinking about the fact that there’s really an actual person in there. Someone who drinks and pees and kicks and sleeps and sucks their cute little baby thumb. I’m getting all mooshy! 😉
       Today was a big day for Boston as the 2 suspects have both been taken off the streets. Some people question in this world we live in, should we be bringing babies into it? Our pastor preached recently that we are to occupy until the time of the Lord’s return. We are to bring children into this world as the Lord blesses us and raise them in godly ways. Now is the perfect time to have a baby. If the Lord doesn’t come back in our time, who will witness to the lost souls? I have no idea why I bothered to write that just now… I guess it was on my mind.
     I’m glad I have this blog to do my updates. I don’t update on pregnancy on Facebook except our announcement. I have friends suffering from infertility and I hated reading pregnancy updates/announcements all the time. I still have major problems with people complaining about their pregnancy symptoms and “we weren’t even trying! We were going to wait till we got our careers and house blah blah blah… ” Or the ever famous “we started trying last month. We thought it would take awhile. Getting pregnant is easy!” Its nice to post on here where people only have to read it if they want to. Not that I would complain! 😉 I probably sound like a bitter kill-joy. But after years of infertility and inferiority, reading of other peoples joy that they oftentimes don’t embrace becomes tiresome and annoying. Its like they live in their own little oblivious world…. and they don’t even know how blessed they are. If you don’t understand, then thank God you’re not infertile. If you do understand, God bless your heart.
       I like to close with a prayer for my baby. God, I thank You and I praise You for this precious baby You have made. Please continue to protect this miracle You have formed in my womb. I pray that it will continue to grow strong and healthy according to Your will. In Jesus name, amen.
       

    The last week of the first trimester depending on how you calculate it. It’s odd though. In the last several weeks I’ve learned that stats don’t matter. How far along you are doesn’t really matter. (Of course, getting to viability is sure to make anyone breath a little easier). All that matters is that God sustains the life of our baby. Its all up to Him. This becomes ever more appearent to me daily. I thought I would breath much easier at 8 weeks, 10 weeks, 12 weeks…. progress is wonderful, but I still have my fears. All I can do is pray and trust God.
      My OB appointment went well last week. (Aside from a nasty pap test). My Dr talked about God the whole time which was suprising but great! Its a group practice though so I don’t know how much I will see her. We saw the baby on a tiny handheld ultrasound. I guess they use that instead of a doppler. It was a nice treat. Baby was head down with its long, long legs in the air. Or water I should say. 😉 I’m weaning off my PIO now down to 1 shot every other day. Then I’ll stop Lord willing around 14 weeks. I’m continuing my lovenox for awhile although the Dr felt like I could stop whenever I wanted to. I told her I wanted to continue for awhile for my peace of mind. She was very understanding.
       I am so ready to start feeling movement! I know it might still be awhile but I’m really looking forward to it. I hear it moving sometimes on the doppler. I love hearing those movements!!!
      I’ve gained 2 pounds from my normal weight or 5 pounds from my IVF weight. The drugs made me lose weight with both IVFs. I’m glad I’ve gained a little. I was worried I might not gain because I’ve been the same weight for probably about 8 years. Never varied by more than a few pounds. Probably a silly worry…. its just good to know that I can put on a little fat for breastfeeding.
       Well, I have to go feed this baby lunch now. My heart goes out to women who don’t have enough to eat during pregnancy. Pregnancy hunger is a whole new kind of appetite and ignoring the hunger just makes me sick. God bless those women.
      God, please continue to bless me with the privilege and joy of carrying this sweet baby. Please guard it and put a hedge of protection around it. In Jesus name, amen.

    Oh my, I’m so tired. This might be short. I can’t believe its midnight and I’m still up and semi-functioning. This little baby likes me to go to bed now no later than 10pm. The funny part is, I rarely can sleep in. I have a hard time falling asleep again after DH leaves for work. At first it was because I had to get up and eat. The hunger was strong in the morning. Now I just can’t get comfy. I still sleep on my tummy occasionally but its getting uncomfortable. The only way I ever really sleep normally is on my back. I’ve been trying to adjust to the transition to side sleeping but I’m not making any progress. I always wake up on my back!
      Well, enough of that… I think I like the new OB’s office. I haven’t met the OB yet, just the consultant talked to me at my appointment, but she was really nice and caring. People probably think I’m a little hard on drs. Maybe I am… I guess I’m pretty picky. But when it comes to having this baby I do want the best care possible. The only thing I can really say I didn’t like about this office was that you’re not allowed to have a birth plan. I think though that they would be willing to work with the things that I want just that I’m not allowed to be super picky about how things go. As in: I won’t be allowed to write my huge list of everything that I do and don’t want and pass it out to every nurse who sees me. 😉 What happened to the good ol days when people had their babies at home? My mom did it 7 times. I’m actually pretty comfortable with the idea of delivering at home. I’ve been at home births and I know how relaxed and soothing they are. But then again it’s really nice to have that quality care there in case something goes wrong with the baby. So, DH and I have decided to deliver at the hospital. I know that I am definitely glad to be getting my prenatal care from an OB. Ultrasounds are nice! And having someone who can order meds if needed is nice too.
       We are getting closer to finishing PIO shots! I think we get to stop after the OB sees me next week. But honestly, if she said we are going till 40 weeks, I would do it gladly. At this point I just want baby to be safe. I have no concern for my tushy anymore. I’ve had several people tell me that if they had to go through IVF and take shots ect that they would have just not had children. I don’t understand! Pain is temporary! Needles are tiny! I am a whole lot bigger than those shots. I take my shots with joy now because my baby needs them and I would do anything for this baby.
      I bought my first maternity jeans last week. I was getting desparate! I had been wearing my pj bottoms in PUBLIC. Oh the shame! 😉 Haha. But really, my old jeans couldn’t be zipped if I was sitting and the whole rubber band closure idea wasn’t working out. The abdominal pressure was causing cramps too so, shockingly it was already time for maternity. I was embarrassed at the store because I felt like I looked too small to be buying maternity but let me just say “oh, what a relief it is!” They are so comfortable!!! Today I had to buy maternity bras. (Went ahead and got nursing bras. Why not?) I think they will take some time to get used to. But no wires is amazing !!
And yesterday I got my first “are you expecting?” I was suprised it was noticeable to literally your average Joe. (His name really was Joe.) Then came the whole “was it planned or a suprise?” I realized that I don’t know how to answer that. We planned IVF and hoped it would work but the fact that it did was a suprise. So ummm, BOTH! 🙂
      WOW. I thought this would be short and I havent even talked about our ultrasound yesterday. It was great! The baby was precious, cute, adorable…. kicking, flipping, waving and looking so much bigger than last week. It was measuring 4 days ahead!! Not sure what thats from… maybe my pregnancy addiction to eggs. I can’t get enough. I’ve gained very little weight myself. Maybe 1 or 2 pounds above my normal but I gained back what I lost from IVF.
      Ok, I have to sleep now. Dear God, please bless and protect this adorable little baby You have made in me. Please continue to make it grow strong and healthy. In Jesus name, Amen.

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